HTPB 20.3

 If last week was the week of blowouts, this was the week of upsets.  The lower seeded team won in 5 of the 7 games.  

The Collegians put up 132 points led(bian) by Matthew Stafford's 35 points to victory over first place Hardcore Cabinet.  Hampered by AJ Brown's injury and Kyler Murray's sub par performance, HC tasted defeat for the first time, although remains atop the standings.  The two teams combined for 46 points out of their defenses.  

Josh Allen and the reanimated corpse of Zeke Elliot led ODS to their first win and BCC first defeat.  BCC was let down by CMC injury, but he is used to be being disappointed.  (See Wright, Eric).  Other than the two monster performances stated before, ODS got little production from the rest of his roster, unless you count injuries as production. (Shepard, Moore, White).  

The Big Nasty Express used the highest score of the season to vault all the way into 9th place.  Great performances from Herbert, Adams, Mattison, Chase, and Hunt added up to a victory.  Blue Gatorade takes the tough luck loss with the third highest score in the league this week.  Although it was only the second biggest letdown of the weekend, as he toured colleges that his parents can't afford.  Quit looking at free agents and crack the books because your ass needs a scholarship.

Bricklayers got their first win of the season and per his modus operandi, it was of the lucky variety.  Ryan Tannehil joined Cooper Kupp on the island this week, but it was enough to best Dollars.  Who for the second week in a row put up the lowest total in the league.  These are the only two teams to have not cracked the top the seven in a week in scoring.  It's beginning to look like the JK Dobbins injury wasn't the only issue with $$'s squad.  Can he turn it around?  He luckily has all that FAAB he saved losing the tie break on Eli Mitchell.

It was the Dak and D show for the Italian Stallions who picked up a victory over Eh Bid Dude.  Half of the players in this match up failed to break the 8 point barrier.  First round running backs tell the story for the future of these squads as EBD is hoping that this game was the first for a return of healthy Saquon Barkley and IS hopes that Cook gets back in the kitchen soon.

Los Zapatistas handed Tinker Stinkers their first loss of the season.  LZ got 59 points out of his running backs and Kirk Cousins did in fact "Like that!" to lead The Shoes to victory.  Tinker Stinkers tried to win the Jim Tressel way with kicking and defense, but it was to no avail.  TS strategy of over drafting kicker, defense, and quarterback because they score more points worked as they scored 53% of his points.  It was those pesky every other position that let him down.

In the May Be Fat memorial doo doo butter game of the week, SMBR eked out a victory over RM, 93-86.  Miles Sanders did not in fact fumble and break his leg simultaneously in his first touch of the game.  RM has been Jekyll and Carlos Hyde this season.  With two stink bombs and league leading week.  SMBR would have only beaten two teams this week, but it cancels out his tough week 1 loss.  

In Weekly Pick'em results, Dom went a stellar 7-0 while EBD and Tinker Stinkers went 2-5.  Week 4 pick em available here.

Week 3 Power Rankings

1. HC 32-7

2 TC 31-8

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3. BG 25-14

4. BCC 24-15

5. SMBR 22-17

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6. IS 20-19

7. TS 19-20

7. LZ 19-20

9. BNE 18-21

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10. EBD 16-23

11. BL 15-24

12. RM 14-25

13. ODS 12-37

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14 $$ 6-33

Analysis:  Blue Gatorade has by far been the unluckiest.  Bad luck has cost him a whopping 5 spots in the standings.  Tinker Stinkers has been the luckiest by a slim margin.  HC and TC are currently the top two teams in the league by quite a bit.  $$$ has been really terrible.  The top seven continues to be dominated by people who don't get into groups in an individual competition and nary a AOE member to seen.  

Week 4 Preview

The premiere match up of the week is #1 Hardcore Cabinet vs #5 Tinker Stinkers

SMBR vs ODS

BNE vs LZ

BL vs BCC

IS vs BG

$$$ vs TC

The Toilet Bowl Slap Fight of the Week is EBD vs RM.

Thanks for reading and enjoy week 4!

HTPB Week 20.2

The theme of the week was massacres and disappointing comeback hopes.

 

Week 2 seemed like we may get some fireworks after only 1 close game in week 1, but 3 chances at  Monday Night miracles only led to 1 come from behind victory although with 3 guys going a only a short lead to overcome, Los Zapatistas win against Bricklayers was expected.  Los Zapatistas was able to overcome 1.85 points from Laviska Shenault which was still more than his keeper Brandon A Yuk (trademark pending, bite me Dom).  Cooper Kupp continues to be an island unto himself on Bricklayers squad who is struggling with their Super Bowl hangover.

It was the week of Rush'n Missiles as 72 points from the Monday night stack of Rodgers and Jones gave RM, the high score and the position bet for the week.  $$ managed to put up only 67 points and that's with Tampa's two defensive TD's giving him 19.  Usually when a team puts up that shit of a score, the defense usually puts up 2 points or less. It takes an entire lineup crap performance to lose by 99 points.  Dollars had 99 problems this week and sleeping through inactives wasn't one. 

The second molly whopping of the week was Hardcore Cabinet's decimation of Ogre's Death Squad.  Kyler Murray and Derrick Henry outscored ODS' entire squad completely by themselves.  In a match-up of what is currently the first place and highest scoring team and the last place lowest scoring team, such a beat down should have been expected. 

In the closest match up of the week, Tinker Stinkers outlasted Eh Bid Dude by 6 points.  A recount of the points was asked for since EBD was supposed to win in quite the rout per EBD's proclamation Yahoo probably missed those two TD's Matt Prater tossed.  It may be too much to overcome tier jumping receiver, Courtland Sutton's 9 for 159.

In another lopsided affair, SMBR took BNE out behind the shop and put a level 45 Elvin Mage of Summoning beat down on BNE.  Lamar Jackson had more rushing yards than both running backs for BNE (James Robinson and Kareem Hunt) combined. These two teams appear to be headed in opposite directions as SMBR bounced back from their tough luck loss last week.

The Collegians hoped for a Monday Night Miracle from MVS but MVS stood for "much vacant scoring".  Blue Gatorade used a well rounded performance from his team to knock Collegians off their one week stay at the top of the standings.  BG managed to put up an impressive 123 points despite 1 point combined from his kicker and tight end. 

Both Big Cat Crushers and Tom Brady have found the fountain of youth as the Year of Big Cat continues.  The final year undefeated season of dreams stayed alive with a 48 point spanking of Italian Stallions.  Dak Prescott avoided the end zone like IS avoids reading and it cost IS.  

There were no bad beats this week as the top 7 scorers all won, leading to only 1 bad beat all season which is very low.  This gives extra credence to the Bill Parcells line, "You are what your record says you are."  AOE was more AO Ewwwww as all took L's.  The Buffoon Squad is holding down the bottom of the standings. It has been a good time to be unaffiliated as the 3 teams that don't do the silly group thing an individual competition have a combined record of 5-1. The Week 2 Power Rankings (minus luck rankings because there is not enough data yet)

1. HC 24-2

2. BCC/SMBR 20-6

4. TC 19-7

5. TS/BG/IS 14-12

8. RM/EBD 13-13

10. LZ 9-17

11. BL 8-18

12. $$ 6-20

13. BNE 5-21

14. ODS 3-33

Looking ahead to week 3.  

The Matchup of the Week is HC vs TC as two teams that have been atop the standings face off.

ODS vs BCC

BNE vs BG

EBD vs IS

LZ vs TS

RM vs SMBR

The Toilet Bowl Match of the week is $$ vs BL.  

Make your picks here  https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com/f1/14389/pickem

HTPB 20.1

 It was quite the week 1 in the 20th season of HTPB.  This week saw the creation of a new blood feud, as Dollars questioned the manhood of his opponent and the league commissioner over the healthy scratch of Trey Sermon.  Words were thrown and it was the Italian Stallions who came in with their own Sermon on the Mount preaching love.  In the end it mattered no,t as Dollars cruised to victory over ODS led by the week's top non QB score of 31.95 from Amari Cooper from Thursday night. Dollars received nary a vote in the weekly pick'em even from himself. 

The week featured mainly beat downs, but one game was extremely close.  SMBR and IS and a BIL battle that came down to overtime on Monday night.  Lamar Jackson's late fumble have the IS the victory and made SMBR the unfortunate distinction of being the only tough luck loser in the league as the top 7 scoring teams went 6-1.  SMBR can ease their pain with knowing that their 59.85 points for WR/WR/TE earned them the weekly positional bet.

Hardcore Cabinet avenged their Super Bowl loss led by two of the weeks top scorers, #1 overall Kyler Murray and Adam Thielen who are ironically the two players remaining from last year's runner up squad.  Bricklayers made 386 moves between the draft and week 1 and maybe it would have been move 387 that would have made up the 38 point difference.  

Los Zapatistas were gifted the Honda, for beat down of the week.  That Honda won't need a lot of trunk space to hold all of keeper, Brandon Aiyuk, points. 0.14 all on return yardage.  A yuk! Which gave him 6.99 in the weekly bet from Aiyuk, the corpse of Julio Jones, and Robert Tonyan  The Collegians 5 twenty point scorers will give him the weekly high point total win. Collegians had league high running back Joe Mixon, carry the load.

The Collegians 54.38 in the weekly bet would have given Rush'n Missiles a run for their money as a team.   RM put up the weekly low of 67.13, led by .43 out of Jeopardy host Aaron Rodgers who scored .43 more points than deceased Jeopardy host Alex Trebek did this week.  Big Cat Crushers, cruised to easy win in the first week of his swan song season.  

Eh Bid Dude led the entire way over Big Nasty Express, who was derailed early from a -0.60 from Ronald Jones.  EBD spent the weekend crowing about not being picked to win the game in the picks that he thinks are stupid and pointless.  A huge Darren Waller, Monday night game made the score look closer than it was Russell Wilson, DeAndre Hopkins, and Jamaal Williams were too much for BNE to make it close.

In a battle of the two shortest members of the league, Tinker Stinkers defeated Blue Gatorade by 14 in a decently close battle. Tinker Stinkers used Nick Chubb to break the stalemate as most of their rosters under performed aside from the quarterbacks.  Tinker Stinkers proved that they in fact "Had the Meats!" and moved to 1-0.  

Week 2 Preview

The top match up is the Italian Stallions vs the Big Cat Crushers in a 3 vs 4 match up.

Dollars tries to field a complete team against Rush'n Missiles although it might not be necessary.  

Collegians looks to stay hot against Blue Gatorade.  

SMBR looks to get the win that he deserved last week vs BNE

Eh Bid Dude and Tinker Stinkers have already released some footage of their match up. 

Hardcore Cabinet and ODS in a game that will end before 8 pm on Sunday Night.

Bricklayers vs Los Zapatistas is the Toilet Bowl match up of the week.

Make your weekly picks here: 

 https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com/f1/14389/pickem