Bay-Bay's and the Miami Dolphin twosome of Tua and Tyreke led the league in scoring and smashed BNE into a fine paste. Bay-Bay's also won the position bet as Garrett Wilson found paydirt as well.
After the game, BNE refused questions from reporters but did release this statement. Bay-Bay's had spent the offseason flying from Newfoundland down to Miami to scout for the draft and so far so good. The Nick checked out the Bengals practice facility under a highway, saw Joe Burrow sitting with his leg wrapped in ice, and said I gotta get on this train. The week one Bengals train ran as smoothly down the tracks as the Big Nasty Express has for the last two decades.
Despite Johnathan Taylor being injured/contract dispute and JK Dobbins' Achilles imitating a window shade, Eh Bid Dude was able to defeat SMBR behind 8 touchdowns including two from his defense. This matchup of toy buyer and toy seller didn't lead to a close game. This reporter is going to track the Royller Coaster that is fantasy football season, so far he is not paying attention much this season because he is living life, but he also said he scouted MULTIPLE defenses and secured them in the draft. Stay tuned as this story develops.
Ogre's Death Squad fought off his old boy, Josh Allen and Rush 'n Missiles. RM was a hard luck loser scoring in the top half of the league in points but coming away with a loss, which is much different for RM who usually is just a regular loser. ODS was prancing around with new young rebound QB, Anthony Richardson, while Allen through 3 interceptions and got stuck with the kids. Can Josh Allen turn it around in a "Stella got her groove back" scenario? Or has Cory's stink destroyed another promising career?
Blue Gatorade took a break from partying in college to out slap fight Hardcore Cabinet. Hardcore Cabinet bench scored only 3 less points that the starters, showing that coach may need replaced. Step payment has been placed on all tuition checks until the rematch later in the season. Killing Max's education like the nerve endings in Cooper Kupp's leg. Reports are that BG had a party at his townhouse the night before the game that was 10 girls and himself so maybe he has already learned all he needed to at college.
(A fight scene from the 2017 film: Goon- Last of the Enforcers)
It's on Netflix if you hate yourself.
The Collegians were actually able to work around their top of the draft running back and rode that to a victory over the Italian Stallions. The combined 1.4 points from their tight ends was a real chef's kiss of suck. More like loose ends am I right? It doesn't appear that things will get any easier for the Italian Stallions next week as they battle a team they haven't beaten since 2011.*
* editorial note: Gotta get that in now because my team is hella bad right now. Also make sure that you are talking smack and whatnot so your matchup write up is more than this one.
The Shoes began defending their title with an impressive defeat of Dollars. What's more Breece Hall looks great Monday Night so Zapatistas isn't' pulling a 1998-99 Chicago Bulls. Dollars mostly soberly drove his new truck into a good week but couldn't parallel park that thing in the winners circle as Dollars is the top loser of the week. The most important take away here is Sergio brought home a win from Cleveland and followed all ashtrays signs at the draft. Two notorious draft day drunken stumblers, walked out with dignity.
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