HTPB 24.3

 

The ranks of the unbeaten and the winless took a big hit this week.  We had ten teams with goose eggs in a column in the standings and now we have 5. Power Rankings will debut next week.  Right now everyone is bunched up for the most part except Tinker Stinkers a clear #1 and The Loins a distant #14.

Hardcore Cabinet 112.65 defeats Blue Gatorade 88.52

(A smiling dad puts his failure bald son in the corner)

Hardcore Cabinet remains undefeated after picking up a third straight win over someone who has slept with one of Kevin's sisters.  Blue Gatorade's receiving core of McConkey and McLauren did McShitty totaling 12 points.  Hunter Henry led the way for Hardcore Cabinet overcoming yet another poor performance from #1 pick Alshon Jeanty and 2nd round pick Tee Higgins scored 1 point.  

Stabmybalzrepeatedly 105.37 defeats Bricklayers 91.99

(A man in a hoodie unleashes a team of 7 year old flag football players with giant steroid aided muscles to attack a man with a tiny head and tons of gel in his hair.)

Despite a big 21 points from Drake Maye and 26 from the Chiefs defense, Bricklayers couldn't crack 92 points.  Despite Bricklayers opponents having secured exactly zero wins against any other team, he has managed to put together only 1 win.  SMBR used a well rounded performance to pick up his first win of the season right before a tough schedule stretch over the next three weeks where his opponents have a combined record of 8-1.

The Collegians 144.70 defeats Eh Big Dude 95.22

(An mysterious wizard known as the schedule maker breaks off his relationship with a giant who has to face reality)

Eh Big Dude finally played someone who didn't have a terrible week and boy howdy did they over correct as the Collegians went nanners for 144 points.  The Collegians outscored their week 1 performance by 99.  EBD spent a majority of his FAAB on Jake Browning who left a giant brown something on the field this week.  When your team is led in scoring by a white running back not named CMC, it could be a dark stretch for EBD.  

Ogre's Death Squad 137.68 defeats Italian Stallions 98.77

(Shrek puts a stallion in a headlock while a lamb with his ankle in a cast cries.)

Geno Smith dropped a 30 spot to give ODS their first victory of the year. He's running a celebration sale on his onlyfans. The Italian Stallions are staring yet another toilet bowl this year especially after Lamb's early injury today.  Even JTT's 33 spot could not save the Stallions from their fate.  Can the Stallions avoid yet another terrible season?

Rush'n Missiles 124.65 defeats Bay-Bay's 82.63

(A coach chases off a Mountie making sure he is gets back.)

Bay-Bay's returned to where they feel the most comfortable, losing without breaking 100 this week.  RM was able to return to winning form as Josh Allen returned to form as well, getting 27 points.  James Conner was lost for the season for Bay-Bay's. Could Bay-Bay's fall of a cliff just like year after a hot start?   

Tinker Stinkers 132.05 defeats Dollars 126.28

(A dwarf smashes a zombie made of money with his bag of Arby's while a sad reporter takes notes on the changing battle.)

Tinker Stinkers used a whole heaping serving of Monday Night Magic to continue his steam rolling through the league through 3 weeks.  Both Lamar and Montgomery got over 30 points as Dollars tried to get his season of the mat behind two running backs who currently aren't splitting carries in Hampton and Mason.  Right now that all time winning percentage is taking a pretty big hit. Currently his playoff predictions are toilet bowl worthy as well as they have 2 teams that are currently in the top 7 for a combined 33% win percentage.  Take away HC's 3-0 record and the other 6 have a combined 4 wins. 

Los Zapatistas 108.50 defeat Big Nasty Express 103.84

(A man in a sombrero just edges out a train driven by Caleb Williams in a race called "Monday Night")

The BNE tried to pull of  the upset with Caleb Williams scoring a third of his team's points but the victory slipped through his painted nails.  The Zapatistas remained undefeated mainly thanks to the Colts are their horse based defense.   Will BNE still have a chance to make the playoffs when all of his injured guys return?  Will LZ ever lose?  Will I come up with something funny for this game? 

1. no

2. yes

3. not really, this bit is weak

The top pickers went 5-2 this week, with SMBR, BNE, ODS, and EBD hitting those games correctly.  EBD has at least been tied for 1st all three weeks and is our overall leader.  Everybody else got 3 right except for TC who got 4. 

Here are the guys that everybody else was stupid for letting them fall in the draft

BNE- Shaheed

RM- Judkins

TS -Warren 

LZ- Egbuka

ODS- Ayomanor

BB-Javontae Williams

EBD- Diggs

$$- Tuten

IS- Etienne

HC- JCM

BL- Kraft

Too Shitty of a bench- BG,TC

Always fucking with me on the question: SMBR

Game of the Week

#2 Los Zapatistas vs Rush'n Missiles #4

HC vs SMBR

EBD vs BNE

IS vs BB

BG vs ODS

TS vs TC

Toilet Bowl Game of the Week

#13 Dollars vs #12 Bricklayers

Good luck to all next week! 

Click here for episode 1 of Ruthless.

HTPB 23.8

 Week 8 has established the have and the have nots and even some of the haves, have a lot more.

The Collegians defeat Dollars

A man hides under the covers from the number 100.

Dollars has faced an opponent who scored over 100 four times this season and he has lost three of those times.  Cade Otton and his 25 points were able to pick up for a sub par Burrow game who thankfully for the Collegians connected to Jamar Chase for his lone TD.  Cooper Kupp returned to the lineup for Dollars and got into the end zone.  The silver lining for Dollars, is that losing with 117 points will lower how lucky he has been this season.    

Italian Stallions defeats Big Nasty Express

A train robbery led by Mario and Luigi on horseback.

Big Nasty Express put up their second cripplingly shitty week destroying any chance of any tie breaker win for the Express and their multiple decade odyssey for a championship.  The Loins got back on the winning side after a blip loss last week, however they will fall a spot in the standings.  Jordan Love got injured an apparently the rest of his team took him to the hospital as single digits ruled the day for the Express with only Marvin Harrison rocking a number in the tens place. The Stallions got a boost with Tua's return who helped stabilize his quarterback position and gave Achane some room to work. Italian Stallions will try to lead a playoff push and maybe win money for the first time since 2011.  You know what else hasn't happened since 2011.....

Eh Big Dude defeats Ogre's Death Squad

Michael Myers from Halloween meets Michael Myers from Shrek

Ogre's Death Squad left two twenty point scorers on the bench but it wouldn't have mattered as EBD dropped 146 points on him.  Jalen Hurts scored 4 TD's, 3 of which were on the ground while ODS scored 2 TD total.  Eh Big Dude keeps trying to get closer to week 10 for his grand plan.  Now that his team of traded for injured players are healthy can they stay that way?  Since being voted the trick or treat team most likely to make the playoffs, ODS has lost three in a row, and failed to break 90 points. 

 

Stabmybalzrepeatedly defeats Bricklayers

An evil clown with a red shirt with a K on his shirt smashes through a brick wall.

After ensuring not having the first winless season in league history, Bricklayers went back to their losing ways.  The Allen/Kincaid super stack came through but it wasn't enough as SMBR rolled. Goff had an insane stat line, 85 passing yards with 3 touchdowns and 20 fantasy points.  Bricklayers is trying to avoid trying to get his name on the toilet trophy for the second time in 5 years.    And 3rd overall.  

Hardcore Cabinet defeats Los Zapatistas

A man chases a pack of wolves off his porch with a broom.

Hardcore Cabinet won this battle of the last two former champions and swept through the Wolves this season.    Hardcore Cabinet has scored the most points in the league the each of the last two weeks.  HC got 8 touchdowns compared Los Zapatistas 5 in hard luck loss.  Caleb Williams was traded Josh Downs for 8 points.  Is it a good strategy to be tied to two rookie QB's and trying to guess which one will suck less? This may be what unties the shoes.  Don't look know but Hardcore Cabinet is going to be in the mix for back to back champions.  I'm sure he'll never mention that if he goes back to back.  Not even once.

Tinker Stinkers defeat Bay-Bay's

(A small man attacks a mountie with smoked meats)

Bay-Bay's took his 4th straight loss as it is beginning to look like BB's streak of never having made the playoffs in his career looks to continue.  CJ Stroud has been no bueno lately, which will happen when all your receivers are hurt.  Patrick Mahomes has been passed around this season but he has settled in with the Stinkers with his first multiple TD pass game since week 3.  The Stinkers have brought together Nick Chubb and Kareem Hunt to saddle up once again to ride together.  Can either of these teams make a run to the playoffs sitting two games back from the final spot? Both of their schedules ease up a bit the rest of the way.  

Rush'N Missiles defeat Blue Gatorade

A Get back coach yells at a teenager.

This game existed and Rush 'N Missiles picked up another lucky win.  Blue Gatorade has only broken 100 points once this season.  The only thing that can be done for this team is to make Blue Gatorade comfortable and give the other flavors of sugary sports drinks time to say their goodbyes.  RM traded away Jalen Hurts just in time for him to finally out perform Baker Mayfield so he can continue to get less out of the position that he should.  RM has 4 straight games against teams in the top 6 of the standings so he might find himself, getting the fuck back in the standings.  

SMBR takes home the vicotry in week 8 going 6-1 while a host of losers went 3-4, EBD, LZ, BNE, IS and BG.  HC is our new overall leader and EBD is our new last place picker. Full totals can be seen here.

1.  LZ 91-13

He's been a bulldozer all year.  

2. EBD 76-28

3. HC 72-32

4. IS 67-37

These teams are really good, at this point it would be a big upset if somebody not in the top four wins the Big Cat.

5. BB 55-49

Much like being the lone Canadian, BB is the lone team in this tier and has been by far the unluckiest.

6. $$ 51-53

7. TC 50-54

8. RM 49-55

There records may be winning in the standings but have been lucky to be 5-3

9. BNE 43-61

10. TS 41-63

11. ODS 40-64

12. SMBR 37-67

13. BL 36-68

They have point totals in the 700's and losing records.  The playoffs will be a long shot.

14. BG 20-84

How the fuck does he have two wins.  This team is one of the shittiest in league history.

Game of the Week

#1 Los Zapatistas vs #4 Eh Big Dude

#2 HC vs #14 BL

#9 ODS vs #13 BG

#8 BB vs #6 $$

#11 SMBR vs #5 TC

#3 IS vs #7 RM 

(Winner takes the Mike Johnson Cup)

Toilet Bowl Game of the Week

#12 Big Nasty Express vs #10 Tinker Stinkers

Enjoy the Week.

 

 

HTPB 23.7

 

Hardcore Cabinet defeats Stabmybalzrepeatedly

A champion stands triumphantly outside a burning pole barn.

Stabmybalzrepeatedly decided to wrap themselves in a blanket and play world of warcraft while not communicating to human beings as they got demolished by Hardcore Cabinet.  Tank Dell, Deebo Samuel, Tony Pollard, and Dalton Shultz combined for less points than the 13.70 scored by HC's kicker.  Hardcore Cabinet scored 11 TD's in an onslaught that lead the league in points despite three regular starters on bye. Now that HC has that $5 he doesn't need to DJ anymore.  The defending champion has now won 3 in a row and is climbing up the standings in hopes of becoming the first back to back champion in league history.  

Eh Big Dude defeats Blue Gatorade

A potato wearing a hockey mask sits on a couch surrounded by empty Gatorade bottles.

Eh Big Dude continues to ride the D to wins while Blue Gatorade's entire team just continues to ride the D in general.  Blue Gatorade was able to turn a 30 point game from Gibbs into a 79.04 overall score.  Impressive.  The tush push made it's return this week as Jalen Hurts scored a pair of 1 yard touchdowns. Blue Gatorade got negative points from the red rocket which is apropos since his team is dog dick ugly.  It was BG's first draft without asking your author a single question and it shows.   His best season was the year that I had to draft the second half of his squad and hit a lot of late round magic, so he 

could go play in a baseball game that he probably struck out looking 4 times in. 

Los Zapatistas defeats Ogre's Death Squad

 

(A wolf in a sombrero has a food bowl filled with giant big toes.)

Much like Sherman's march to the sea or Big E through an orphanage, Los Zapatistas have left nothing but destruction in their wake.  Ogre's Death Squad lost both Jayden Daniels and DK Metcalf to injuries and it appears as if our voters got it completely backwards.  ODS was just voted the trick or treat team most likely to make the playoffs but his season's outlook has turned as hairy as his back.  The outlook is bright for the Shoes as they have yet to fall below 100 points in a week.  The betting odds are even on which Sergio will achieve first 99 points or 99 kids.  

Rush 'n  Missiles defeat Bay-Bay's

(Two lesser feeble little brothers fight while the crowd goes mild)

This game occurred.  You may not have noticed as it pond water gross.  Bay-Bay's is still trying to figure out who to blame for his 3 game losing streak since he can't blame injuries. It's probably your fault.   Point of clarification, Dan want to be clear that the you isn't him it's you, as in you the reader, ya piece of shit.  CJ Stroud failed to break the 100 yard barrier and his entire squad couldn't break the goal line barrier.  Rush 'n Missiles hopes to have set themselves well for the second half of the season  with only 2 games left against the top teams in the league remaining.  Bay-Bay's has been as hard to pin down as Roy's opinions on a subject as he has three weeks scoring about 125 and 3 weeks failing to break the 100 barrier.  

Bricklayers defeats Tinker Stinkers

(A man finds an oasis in the desert that is run a by tiny people)

Bricklayers finally got off the ranks of the winless this season by defeating the Tinker Stinkers who are having their worst season during their time in the league.  What can be said about Tinker Stinkers this season that hasn't already been said about gonorrhea.   Bricklayers was able to get their favorite kind of running back going again, which is a guy filling in for an injured started for a few weeks.  Bricklayers says that despite the data he FEELS unlucky this season.  Bricklayers is confusing the lack of good luck as bad luck.  He has not been unlucky as the power rankings show, he just hasn't gotten any good luck and caught someone on a bad week.  Probably because Dollars has been hogging that.  I did do the math on teams scoring higher than normal for those teams which is accurate.  Teams playing Bricklayers are 4-2-1 against their mean score.  But and I stress, not getting good luck is not bad luck.  There can be no luck at all.    

The Collegians defeat the Italian Stallions

(Rocky Balboa lays defeated in the middle of a boxing ring while a man with a cap gown is victorious)

The Collegians were once again able to pull out a victory thanks to a Burrow to Chase touchdown.  The Collegians are 3-1 when Chase scores a TD and 1-2 when he doesn't.  The Stallions are hoping to get Tua back next week and managed to go 4-2 (including the game he got hurt in) while rotating in a bunch of sketchy QB's.  The squads went into Monday Night with a Tampa receiver and left the game with two long term injuries. Despite the loss, IS stays in second place and TC find themselves holding onto the final playoff spot. 

Big Nasty Express defeats Dollars

(A steam train smashes through a bank vault sending money flying everywhere.)

In a bit investigative journalism, I have discovered that Dollars named his team not after his last name but the fact that if you score breaks the 100 cent barrier that he can't function.  Twice this season his opponent has broken the century mark and those are both his losses. As usual, BNE enjoys getting a good dicking and got it from Cameron Dicker and his 22 points.  Jordan Love has led the BNE resurgence since being traded to the squad plus a good score from the Philly D.  So clearly BNE has been powered by Dicker Loving the D.  Dollars was held back by the Jets and Whittingham scoring a combined -2 and now may have to hold for dear life to playoff spot as he ends the season with a murderers row final three games of the top three teams in the standings, HC, IS, and LZ.

Everything is coming up Hardcore Cabinet this week as he nailed both weekly bets and led the league with a 6-1 record.  Halfway through no one has went perfecto but 11 times someone has hit 6.  The overall lead is 32-17 held by HC, BL, and TC.  The rear is owned by ODS with a 24-25 record.  It's pretty hard to under .500 in this so good job.  Want to see where you fall? Click here.

 Week 7 Power Rankings

Tier 1

The clear team to beat

1. LZ 80-11 

Just sustained excellence from LZ this season.

Tier 2

In a normal year, the cream of the crop.

Really good squads waiting for LZ to falter.

2. EBD 64-25

3. IS 61-30

4. HC 59-32

Tier 3

Canadians

5. BB 50-41

Tier 4

Mediocre Teams that would be in the playoffs

6. RM 45-46

7. $$ 44-47

Tier 5 

Depending on the day

8. BNE 42-49

9. TC 40-51

10. ODS 40-51

Tier 6 Dog Shit

11. BL 33-58

12. Tinker Stinkers 33-58

13. SMBR 28-63

Tier 7 

Dog shit that was eaten and immediately vomited by a toothless lot lizard

14. BG 18-73

AOE has a had a horseshow and a black cat.  $$ is three spots lucky and EBD is three spots unlucky but once again it's been self inflicted for hopes of a better tomorrow. 

Game of the Week 

The last two champions square off

#1 Los Zapatistas vs #3 Hardcore Cabinet

#9 ODS vs #5 EBD

#8 BB vs #11 TS

#10 BNE vs #2 IS

#6 RM vs BG #13

#4 $$ vs #7 TC

Toilet Bowl game of the week

#14 Bricklayers vs #12 Stabmybalzrepeatedly

Will the league continue to separate? Find out with the start of the second half of the season.  

HTPB 23.4

 

Who hates who answers

BNE hates Cam Newton

TS hates Bernard Berrian from some JV league that doesn't even have a flog

HC -Alvin Kamara

LZ-hates Michael Thomas (he just wrote slant boy, does anyone call him this?  I had never heard it)

ODS hate LeVeon 

BB hates Eddie Lacy on a personal level

BL hates CJ Spiller (Pat Mahomes creeping in)

TC Jeremy Hill (If Hill is found dead, I'm calling the cops on Steve)

CB hates Mark Andrews, see what spite gets you 

BG hates Austin Eckler 

SMBR hates Marshall Faulk (Early SMBR was a shitshow)

Los Zapatistas defeat Big Nasty Express

(A man trades it all away but it is still not enough to defeat Mexican shoes)

The Big Nasty Express has two first round picks this year and neither are on his team anymore.  In exchange he got a Quarterback with a 9-10 record as a starter and a rookie wide receiver.  Love through in some garbage time TD's to make BNE feel better but it was not enough to get the victory.  Justin Fields managed to get 31 points, part of a 7 TD embate by the Shoes.  BNE continues their impressive two decade long run of getting their ass whipped.

Rush'n Missiles defeat Bricklayers

(A winless teacher wipes his tears with Brick bucks while being mocked on the announcements)

The Bricklayers early pick of Patrick Mahomes is going so poorly that his team appears to have committing a murder suicide pact.  Bricklayers atrocious score is more unsettling considering that he got 37 points from his kicker and defense.  Rush Missiles used a well rounded attack from several players to waltz to easy victory.  Rush 'n Missiles is trying to compile back to back winning seasons for the first time ever in their storied franchise history.  This is Rush 'n Missiles franchise story.

Italian Stallions defeats Blue Gatorade

(Rocky Balboa slams a college kid into a bush)

Italian Stallions continues to roll along and Blue Gatorade continues to be just an awful team. IS used 50 combined points from Collins and Robinson to overcome Aaron Rodgers 10 spot.  Mike Gesicki managed to get one catch for a negative 9 yards.   The 110 points was IS lowest total of the season and it was still enough to clobber BG by 27 points.  BG has yet to break the 100 point barrier this season, yet by some black magic isn't even in the bottom two spots in the standings.  

Ogre's Death Squad defeats the Collegians 

(Shrek gives his brother a prolapsed orifice in a football game)

Burrow was unable to connect with Jamar Chase on only one of his two TD passes which spells defeat. This game came down to the 34 point swing on defense or as BNE likes to call it week 2.  Jayden Daniels has emerged and may be a huge find for ODS. He also got 24 points from his favorite Steelers.  TC has been returned to little brother status.  

Bay-Bay's defeats Hardcore Cabinet

(Derrick Henry runs over a cabinet filled with weapons)

Hardcore Cabinet removed Taysom Hill and his two touchdowns and finally gave up DeAndre Swift whose reanimated corpse scored 25.  Derrick Henry outscored Lamar on Sunday Night 39-26 to put the game away.  Henry 39.40 points would have been enough to defeat BNE in week 2 by his lonesome. 
Some people might say you already used that joke this week.  But hey, it was historically bad. But I mean as Dollars would say.  GOT DAMN.  Bay-bay's was fielding membership offers from a trio who only had one member break the century mark this week but may have had blood alcohol contents that did.

Eh Big Dude defeats Tinker Stinkers

(A tiny man tries to trade a bag of trash for a bag of garbage to no avail)

Kenneth Walker returned from injury with 3 TD's because Seahawks receivers were caught on the 1 yard line trip wire.  Tinker Stinkers made several trades recently which felt like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic, as the Stink sank further into the sea.  Tinker Stinkers has fallen on hard times since his impressive playoff streak was broken.    This matchup featured the rare double owner puke.  EBD from consumption and TS from Kenneth Walker. 

Dollars defeats Stabmybalzrepeatedly

A man swims in a martini glass smugly holding a sign that says 97

Dollars put down more drinks than SMBR put up points this week. Dollars has made it to 3-1 with a horseshoe, but was able to overcome the $38 spent for Carson Steele to get negative points and be passed by two guys signed off the street.  Flog researchers have been running tests to see what was more wasted, Dollars on Sunday night or $38 FAAB.  SMBR managed to get off the winless road last week but quickly returned from that detour to return to old school SMBR.  But I am sure it will turn around after the Jets have said that they need to reexamine giving the ball to #2 overall pick at the goal line.  

In weekly pick em, we had a whopping 5 owners go 6-1.  Congratulations to EBD, IS, BB, HC, and TS.  BNE managed to get 2 right so good job by you, buddy.

For the season overall IS is leading these standings as well at 19-9 while BNE and SMBR are 14-15 to bring up the rear which is still pretty good compared to most years. 

All the records can be seen here

We've got power rankings with enough data for some analysis baby!

1. EBD 42-10

2. LZ 42-10

3. IS 41-11

Clear top tier.  These three have been kicking ass and taking names.

4. BB 35-17

5. ODS 31-21

6. RM 29-23

This tier has been very consistent which can lead to championships see HC 2023.

7. $$ 28-24

8. HC 26-26

9. BNE 23-29

I was just as shocked as you to see BNE in here in the mediocre category.

10. Tc 18-34

11. SMBR 14-38

12. BL 13-29

13. BG 11-41

14. TS 11-41

This tier has been awful.  Time to look in the mirror fellas.

As far as luck rankings nobody is more than 2 spots different then they should be which for this point in the year is crazy.  

 Game of the Week

#2 Bay-Bay's vs #4 Los Zapatistas

HC vs TS

ODS vs RM

BL vs $$
EBD vs TC

IS vs SMBR

Toilet Bowl Game of the Week

#10 Big Nasty Express vs #12 Blue Gatorade

See you all next week.

HTPB 23.11

 

The entire United States was caught in the crossfire of this international battle.  Much like their sexual preferences, this was a battle of tag teams.  Tua and Tyreke out Chinese finger cuffed Stroud and Dell, 43-38.  But unfortunately for Bay-Bay's direct eye contact was made and the rest of his team couldn't keep the scoring up, leading to a Los Zapatistas victory.  Achane came back for the Shoes but couldn't finish. The shoes were still able to pull out the win and remain on top of the standings.  Bay-Bay's can still salvage this season and make the playoffs for the first time, especially with a soft remaining schedule of the Goons minus ODS.  

How does this keep happening to Roy.  What was he done to deserve all of this. He is a victim.  Rush 'n Missiles had their first good week other than the week that he scored 141 or the week he scored 135, and if you forget about the three other weeks that he scored more than 100.  So other than that, RM comes out of nowhere and gets a lot of points.    I mean RM was only 4th in the power rankings heading into this week.  Who could have seen such an outcome coming?  How could RM have had a good game?  Especially after the previous time that he has had a good game?  Normally I have to spend a good portion of this blog refuting things Roy says in an emotional outburst, but he must have clarity during over night feedings because his Kenneth Walker getting his average instead of being injured was correct.  He would have won by a point in that scenario.  

Blue Gatorade pounded Italian Stallions, as it appears that the IS have quit on their coach after being eliminated from the playoffs.  The Stallions got the double goose egg from the Titans and Gabe Davis.  Trevor Lawrence outscored everyone on the Stallions not named Hurts or McCaffery by himself.  Dom is so at home in last place, he has taken up permanent residency on the toilet trophy.  Blue Gatorade has blossomed ever since he traded Jefferson away going 5-2 since unloading the dead weight of the number 1 overall draft pick.

Hardcore Cabinet and The Collegians each started off a run after conceding victory.  Hardcore Cabinet won their 3 straight Monday Night Miracle and has won 6 out of 7 games.  The Collegians were giving the Chiefs a pregame pep talk on what they needed to pull off the victory.  Hardcore Cabinet was able to get the win despite only getting 88 points which would have only beaten 3 teams in the whole league.  The Collegians couldn't pull off a victory Cooper Kupp leaving injured very early.  The Collegians were unable to get their FOURTH win of the year while scoring under 100 points.  

Sliding in the standings

Jeremy's Brother has fallen on hard times having not broken 100 or gotten a win in a month and has gone from first place to 12th in record time. Dollars has harnessed the power of Josh Dobbs to pull above .500.  Dollars has managed to not have an opponent score more than 107 in week and has turned that into 6-5 record.  JB tried trading for Patrick Mahomes but it was too little too late to help a lineup that has not been producing.  JB's amazing streak of never having missed the playoffs is on life support.  Dollars currently has 4 of his playoff predictions in the top 7 with one already locked in. 

AJ Brown decided to leave early for Thanksgiving and Bricklayers were unable to defeat SMBR.  Saquon Barkley finally lived up to his draft position and Kevin was able to use that keep his playoff hopes alive.  Bricklayers has despite the 6-5 can still rocket up the standings with their high point total and a softer remaining schedule of IS, JB, $$ to end the season.  Or maybe it's the beginning of an epic collapse.  Although with his point total, BL most likely only needs to win one more game to get into the playoffs.  SMBR hasn't scored less than 110 in the last month.  Watch out if SMBR can find a few wins in their last three against BG, EBD, and ODS.

Ogre's Death Squad has continued their unlucky rise up the standings.  ODS despite having the least points in the league is somehow is only missing out on the playoffs via tiebreaker at the moment.  A difficult schedule of LZ, RM, and SMBR makes a playoff bid still very unlikely.  Both BNE and Joe Burrow's seaons were mercy killed this week.  Burrow fell only a scant 35 tuddies short of BNE's preseason prediction. BNE reacquired Brock Purdy like a boomerang.   Despite the poor seasons for both of these squads.  They aren't even the worst goon.   Congratulations Italian Stallions on getting under that low low bar.  Limbo champ, Baby!!

1. BL 90-53

2. EBD 88-55

3. LZ 88-55

4. RM 79-64

5. BB 75-68

6. BG 74-69

7. SMBR 72-71

8. $$ 71-72

9. HC 66-77

10. BNE 65-77-1

11. TC 62-80-1

12. JB 61-82

13. ODS 56-87

14. IS 53-90

EBD has been the most unlucky 7 spots short.  His brother is second at 6 spots.  The luckiest has been HC 6 spots higher than he should while ODS is 5 spots ahead. 

SMBR won the pick em with a 5-2 record.  Last place at 2-5 belongs to BB, JB, and BG.  Get your picks in here.  Remember that with the Thanksgiving holiday you should get your picks in early.  We have been perfect but usually lose some this week with the holiday. 

Los Zapatistas has clinched.  BNE joins IS in the eliminated trash heap.

 

Playoff odds: HC 90%, BG 90%, BL 85%, RM 72%, $$ 63%, EBD 50%, TC 44%, SMBR 32%, ODS 33%, BB 28%, JB 8%

#1 seed: LZ 70%, BG 14%, BL 5% HC 3%, $$ 3%

Toilet Trophy: IS 88% BNE 9%, JB 1%

Game of the Week 

#1 Los Zapatistas vs #8 Ogre's Death Squad

HC vs EBD

BB vs TC

BG vs SMBR

BL vs IS

$$ vs RM

Toilet Game of the Week

#12 Jeremy's Brother vs #13 Big Nasty Express

(The winner is mathematically saved from Toiletries)

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving.  I am thankful for this league, you guys, and those views and the support of my sponsors.