Ruthless C Shows WWE Velocity 1/3/2004 & WWE Sunday Night Heat 1/4/2004

                                                   

                        Check out the podcast of Raw and Smackdown on the North South Connection!

Josh Mathews and Bill Demott will be doing the commentary on this episode of Velocity and welcome us to 2004!

The only video of this show that I could find had the top caught off.  Don't worry, Josh and Bill were not in a terrible Final Destination style accident.  

Match #1

A-Train vs Funaki

During the introductions, Josh Mathews jokes that this is the 2,385th meeting between to the two.  According to cage match this is their 28th and final meeting, including battle royals and house shows.  Ten of those matches were tag matches.  Of the 15 total televised non battle royals, this is their 8th singles match on Velocity.  Until this point, Funaki had managed to win one bout in the series which was on the 9/17/02 Velocity. 

Funaki kicks A-Train in the legs to break free of a choke slam attempt.  Funaki tries to control the Train with armbars but gets mowed down with a clothesline.  Funaki rolls away from several stomp attempts and exits the ring.  A cat and mouse game begins with Funaki getting the edge when Train gets back into the ring.  He jumps on Train's back and grabs a sleeper hold. Train smashes him into the corner turnbuckles.  A-Train misses a charge and Fuanki gets a roll up attempt for 2.  A-Train recovers with a big shoulder block to a sprinting Funaki.  He immediately follows up with the Train Wreck back breaker for the win a brisk fun 1:16. (* 1/2)  Final head to head record A-Train 7 Funaki 1.

Match #2

Doug and Danny Basham with Shaniqua vs Joel and Jose Maximo 

This match is very hard to writeup with the matching gear and their heads not shown on the screen, I will have the correct participant occasionally when commentary mentions it.  A Basham tosses a Maximo back after a few collar and elbow tie up attempts.  He hits a scoop slam but misses the elbow drop follow up and Maximo is able to scurry away and tag his brother.  Maximo is immediately driven into the corner and the Bashams tag.  A tilt-a-whirl head scissors allows for a tag to Jose Maximo who hits a top rope high crossbody for a 2 count.  Maximo grabs a head lock but the other Basham pulls the ropes down and he crashes to the floor.  Shaniqua gets a few shots in.  Back in the ring Doug Basham gets a leg drop and a hard irish whip.  The Bashams tag with some corner strikes and cheap shots and a headlock.  Jose Maximo gets jawbreaker on Danny to break free and tag out.  Joel Maximo cleans house with drop kicks.  The Maximos attempts a poetry in motion is stopped and caught mid air as one Maximo is slammed on the other.  High leg lariat after a switheroo to win for the tag champs after 4:48. (**1/2)

Jamie Noble is speaking to Nidia backstage.  

Jaime Noble tells Nidia, he doesn't know what Rey Mysterio said to her a few weeks ago on Smackdown, but since it came from Rey, it's a lie.  Nidia doesn't know what to think, because she loves Jaime very much but what Rey said makes a ton of sense.  She feels lost.  Noble can't believe that Nidia would believe a man in a mask over him.  He can't believe how much of his money he has had to spend on doctors only to get no where with her recovery.  Noble says there is a chance that she might not be able to ever see again.  Nidia says no, she will see again. She promises.  Noble says that if you want to promise something, promise you won't get involved in my match tonight.  She agrees.  

Match #3

Jaime Noble vs Brandon Groom

As Noble makes his entrance, Josh Matthews comments on the ridiculousness of not trusting wrestlers in masks.  DeMott says that the real people you shouldn't trust are people who don't speak English.  To start, Noble backs the larger Groom up and sweeps the leg and controls Groom with a headlock.  Groom gets a toss and a drop kick.  Groom tries to control but gets sent into the the turnbuckles hard and Noble lays in stomps in the corner.  Noble hits a suplex and locks in a arm and back stretch.  Groom escapes with a back suplex and follows it up with some clotheslines.  Noble lands a back elbow and attempts a neck breaker but Groom grabs the top rope causing Noble to crash and burn.  Groom gets an Oklahoma roll for 2.  Noble escapes hits his DDT and a dragon sleeper for the submission win in 3:35.  (*3/4) 

Match #4

Orlando Jordan & Shannon Moore vs Akio & Sakoda

Orlando Jordan takes down Sakoda, but Sakoda grabs an arm as they trade holds.  Jordan gets a shoulder block, hip toss, and a head lock takeover.  He tags in Shannon Moore who somersaults over the top rope into a sunset flip for a one count.  Sakoda tags out.  Moore gets a shoulder block a back leg sweep.  Moore goes up and over in the corner and nails a spinning heel kick for 2.  Akio turns a springboard crossbody into a rib breaker.  Sakoda tagged back in to stomp on the ribs, hit a back breaker, and hangs Moore in the tree of woe.  Orlando tries to come into the ring, which allows Tajiri's henchmen to lay the boots in the corner.  Akio hooks Moore in an abdominal stretch.  He sends Moore into the corner and Akio runs up his back and lands on his feet.  He charges again but Moore side steps and hip tosses Akio into the turnbuckles.  Hot tag to Jordan who has drop kicks and back body drops for everybody.  His Johnson shuffle homage gets interrupted and his gets taken out with a little high low from Akio and Sakoda.  Moore breaks up the fall.  Moore moonsault planchas outside onto Akio.  Jordan grabs Sakoda for a running powerslam to pick up the win in 4:57. (**3/4).

Our Sunday Night Heat cold open is a closeup of an ambulance logo with a piece of blue duct tape labeled Stevie Corp.  The camera pulls back reveals that it is not ambulance but a golf cart with the self proclaimed general manager of Sunday Night Heat, Steven Richards sitting proudly in the drivers seat.  Test arrives and he is not pleased.  Richards asks if he needs a ride.  Test does not in fact needs a ride.  He would however like to take Victoria for a ride.  The only reason Richards defeated him last week was because Victoria distracted.  She was in tight spandex, so Test just wanted to go up behind her and say, "yeah baby, it's me Test" while making his "o" face. Tonight, Test is going to beat up Richards so badly in their match tonight that he will never be able to please a women again that's where Test will step in, because once you go Test you forget about the rest.  Richards completely no sells this and says you sure you don't need a ride?  Test gets frustrated and kicks the cart only to hurt his foot and hop off upset.  

Match #1

Test vs Steven Richards with Victoria

On his entrance, Test flexes and licks his bicep.  Victoria gets her own entrance for this match.  Test clobbers Richards from behind while he admires his "Flower" on the ramp.  Test blows Victoria kisses.  Test tosses Richards into the ring and starts raining down fists.  Test locks in an odd for lack of a better term, sideways torture rack.  Richards pushes off the turnbuckles with his feet to escape.  Test attempts a full nelson slam, but Richards slips out of that.  Richards scores with a snap suplex, swinging neck breaker, and a bulldog for a 1 count.  Test takes over but Richards escapes a pump handle attempt, but this time falls victim to the pump handle.  Test ties him in the ropes, Andre the Giant style.  Victoria enters the ring and Test grabs her and plants one on her.  Victoria smiles, rubs his chest and kicks Test square in his quiz.  The referee has freed Richards, who gets a sloppy roll up while holding the ropes to pick up the victory in 3:30. (1/2*)

Match #2

Rico with Miss Jackie vs Brandon Groom

Rico spanks Groom.  Groom grabs a go behind and Rico bends over in a three point stance and grinds his buttocks into Groom's privates.  Rico goes on the attack with fists but falls victim to two hip tosses, scoop slam, and drop kick. Miss Jackie gets on the apron. Brandon Groom heads over to her but is still
able to duck Rico's clothesline attempt.  Groom charges Rico but Rico low bridges him to the outside.  Rico slams his head into the barricade ringside and then drapes him on the apron to kick Groom in his mouth.  Once in the ring again, Rico elbows Groom repeatedly in the head and hits a lifting kick.  Rico hits a sexualized elbow drop and pin cover for 1.  They trade chops.  A step up corner kick to the mush but Grooms down to the mat.  Rico heads to the top for a dive, but Groom gets the knees up. Three separate roll up attempts by Groom fail. Groom hits a spinning powerslam and heads to the top.  He misses a top rope crossbody and Rico finishes him with a devastating neck breaker in 3:48.  (*)

Match #3

Tommy Dreamer vs Matt Hardy

Matt Fact #1: Matt's first job was at a carwash.

Matt Fact #2 Matt is more extreme than Tommy Dreamer.

They trade slaps to begin.  Dreamer gets a scoop slam but Matt Hardy sends him to the outside by the tights and rams Tommy into the ring apron spine first.  Back in the ring, Matt gets a scoop slam, followed by a series of boots to Dreamer's gut.  Hardy heads to the top turnbuckle, but Dreamer pulls his leg and crotches him.  A Hardy back elbow sends Dreamer to the mat so that Hardy can miss a moonsault.  They reset with a strike exchange that Dreamer wins.  Dreamer delivers two separate styles of neck breakers, first swinging and then fall away. Dreamer hits a follow up death drop DDT.  Hardy turns a death valley driver into a side effect for a 2 count.  Hardy grabs Dreamer's kendo stick but misses with it.  Dreamer hits a sit out powerbomb.  Dreamer takes the cane up to the top and show boats to the crowd.  Hardy follows him up there and hits a twist of fate from the top to pick up the victory in 4:26.  (*1/2)

Match #4

Val Venis and Lance Storm wtih three ladies of the night vs La Resistance (Rene Dupree and Rob Conway)

Storm and Conway trade control holds, until. Lance goes up and over and nails a big punch to the face.  Conway scurries away to tag Dupree.  Lance controls until a tag to Val.  Val comes in and gets a scoop slam and they hit stereo elbow drops.  Dupree fires back with chops and forces Venis into the corner for the tag.  Conway is tagged in and connects on a back elbow, scoop slam, and a knee drop.  Val gets the boot up on a charge by Conway. Venis tries to climb to the top himself but gets pushed off by Dupree.  Dupree is tagged in and he exchanges strikes with Venis until Venis gets a half nelson slam. Both men are down.  Val crawls over and tags in Storm.  Storm is a house of fire with clotheslines and drop kicks.  He hits a steamroller and a springboard dropkick.  Dupree breaks the pin attempt.  Lance and Val attempt a double team maneuver but Dupree breaks that up as well.  Storm flips out of a slam attempt by Conway but Dupree grabs his foot from the floor.  This allows Conway to hit a devastating DDT and get the win in 5:43. (**)

Tomorrow night it's Raw in Memphis and Steve Austin is the sheriff!  What will that mean!?

Ruthless C Shows WWE Velocity 11/29/2003 & WWE Heat 11/30/2003

 

Check out the audio podcast breaking down Raw and Smackdown as well.  

What better way to recover from Black Friday shopping, than watching Velocity on Saturday night.  

Match #1 

Orlando Jordan vs Kanyon

The crowd chants Kanyon sucks before bell.  Kanyon backs him in the corner and lays some strikes into Jordan.  Jordan goes up and over and hits a hip toss, drop kick, spinning powerslam and an arm bar.  Kanyon stops Jordan's mounted punches with an eye rake.  Kanyon gets a second rope Russian leg sweep.  He gets a vertical suplex, several elbow drops and northern lights suplex for 2.  Kanyon locks in a neck vise.  OJ fights out and hits a series of flying forearms and the Johnson shuffle.  A spinning powerslam allows OJ to climb the top rope.  Kanyon attempts to suplex him off the top but OJ casts him off and hits a top rope crossbody to pick up the win in 4:31. (**3/4)

Match #2

Nunzio vs Funaki

A test of strength is teased but Nunzio gets a knee to the stomach.  Funaki fires back with a hip toss and a series of arm drags.  Nunzio catches Funaki with a dropkick to the gut on a crossbody attempt.  Nunzio grabs a headlock.  Funaki escapes, Nunzio misses a drop kick. Funaki gets a backslide attempt.  Nunzio nails the Sicilian Slice 2nd rope leg drop for a two count.  He locks in a second headlock and transitions to body slam.  Funaki knocks Nunzio off the top rope to crotch him and follows that up with a bulldog and then an enziguri for 2.  Funaki connects with a top rope crossbody but Nunzio rolls through for two.  Funaki slips on the ropes attempting an up and over.  Nunzio grabs Funaki legs and slams him off the turnbuckle.  Nunzio puts Funaki on the top but falls victim to a tornado DDT for the 3 count.  (***)

Match #3

Sean O'Haire vs Gary Schippreit

Schippreit hits a drop kick that O'Haire shrugs off.  O'Haire beils him across the ring and nails him with a spinal tap kick.  He follows up with a snap mare and a second spinal tap kick.  Schippreit gets a desperation jaw breaker, but gets smeared by a ridge hand.  O'Haire nails some strikes to the back and then a back stretch.  O'Haire throws Schippreit on his back and ends him with a widow maker in 2:28.  (*1/4)

Match #4

 FBI (Johnny The Bull Stamboli & Chuck Palumbo vs Paul London & Spanky)

This tag match stems from the chaos of last week's Velocity.  C Show Continuity BABY!

Palumbo and Spanky start things off.  They trade strikes, a badly which Palumbo comes out on top of.  Spanky gets a corner run up moonsault, but gets quickly mowed down by a clothesline.  Johnny the Bull Stamboli tags in for a short arm clothesline.  Spanky gets an enziguri and is able to tag in London, who hits a high crossbody.  London escapes a gorilla press, flips off of The Bull right into a big boot from Palumbo.  London gets wishboned around the ring post and stomped.  Palumbo hits London with a running punt kick to the gut.  Stamboli tags in for a few stomps and quickly tags back out.  Palumbo puts on a neck vise, London almost escapes to make the tag but is thwarted.  Palumbo misses a corner charge and cracks his shoulder on the post but is still able to cut off the tag.  London hits a drop sault and they both tag out.  Spanky cleans house with a head scissors to Palumbo and a launched drop kick to Johnny the Bull.  Spanky heads to the top rope but Palumbo pulls him down to crotch him on the turnbuckle.  Paul London gets a Russian Leg Sweep from the second rope to Stamboli.  Palumbo crushes London with the whack kick.  Spanky hits a top rope drop kick to Palumbo.  Spanky manages to splash Stamboli on his landing from the dropkick.  Brian Hebner doesn't make the count because he is trying to clear the carcass of Paul London.  When he does make it over to make the count, it is such a close nearfall that the time keeper erroneously rings the bell.  Hebner waves it off. Spanky goes for sliced bread but gets caught and falls victim to the assisted Sicilian slice leg drop by the FBI to get the win in 6:52. (***1/4).

Sunday Night Heat

Al Snow says his favorite part of Raw Roulette the past the week was the catch the midget match and that little people equal big ratings. 

Match #1

Rene Dupree with Rob Conway vs Tommy Dreamer

Rene Dupree gets a head lock and then does his frolic dance.  Dupree misses a leap frog because Dreamer stops short and punches the Frenchman in the face.  Dreamer gets a drop toe hold and an arm drag.  Dupree gets s scoop slam but misses an elbow drop.  Dreamer baits Dupree into a charge and low bridges him over the top.  Tommy Dreamer baseball slides both members of La Resistance. Once back inside, the ring, Conway pulls the ropes down which causes Dreamer to spill to the outside.  Dupree gets a neck breaker and a full nelson.  Dreamer reverses an Irish whip into a powerbomb.  Dupree misses a charge attempt and falls victim to a back body drop and neck breaker for a 2 count.  Dreamer punches Conway off of the apron and turns around into a fisherman's suplex for the win in 3:25. (*1/4).

Match #2

Steven Richards with Victoria vs John Heidenreich

Richards gets a headlock but John Heidenreich comes back with several shoulder blocks.  Richards tries to bail but is brought back in by Heidenreich, who picked him up like a baby.  On the way back into the ring, Victoria grabs Heidenreich's leg which lets Richards hit him with a running knee to the ribs.  The general manager of Heat throws Heidenreich into the ring post, followed by stomps and a series of arm wrenches and bars.  One sequence Stevie yells out that it is a Steviewara arm bar.  Heidenreich powers up out of the hold directly into an electric chair but drops Stevie right on his head and neck.  Stevie doesn't really move after that and Heidenreich pins him in 3:18. Stevie Richards in an interview on the Place to Be Podcast  (1 hour and 53 minute mark) confirms he broke a bone in his neck on the move. (1/4*)

Clips from Goldberg on the Maury Povich Show which show Goldberg meeting an 8 year old superfan with a condition called Progeria a genetic condition that causes rapid aging.  People who suffer from Progeria usually only live until their mid teens. Goldberg lets him meet some of the other stars of the movie "The Longest Yard" that Goldberg is filming.  The young boy meets Burt Reynolds and Bob Sapp and gets to have fun on set.  A nice little feature and good job, Goldberg giving back.

Match #3

Devon Dudley vs Mark Jindrak

The match begins with some collar and elbow tie ups and go behinds.  Jindrak gets a shoulder block which Devon follows up with an arm drag.  Jindrak does a leg sweep and Devon catches an arm bar followed by a shoulder block.  Jiindrak hits one of his special high drop kicks, followed up by elbow drops and synchs in a head lock.  Devon breaks free and tries a sunset flip and cradle pin to avail.  Jindrak clotheslines Devon to the mat and grabs another headlock.  Jindrak attempts to splash in the corner but misses and hangs himself in the ropes.  Dudley gets a series of clotheslines, neck breaker, flying forearm, and reverse headlock slam.  Devon runs into a back elbow and a big boot. Jindrak climbs to the top and hits a flying clothesline to get the win in 5:18.  (*3/4) It seemed like Devon might have kicked out.  Afterwards, Jindrak eyes Devon's tag title that is one a chair in the time keepers area.  

Match #4

Maven vs Rob Conway with Rene Dupree

 

Rob Conway gets some quick jabs.  Maven catches a kick and started punching back.  Conway misses on an up and over attempt.  Maven nails a drop kick.  He misses the follow up crossbody and flies through the ropes to the outside.  Conway knees him on his way back into the ring which sends Maven flying into the barricade. Once back in the ring, Conway hits a running knee and diving punch of some kind, before grabbing a head lock.  Maven attempts some rollups to get out of it.  Once back up on their feet Maven hits a clothesline, shoulder block, and spin kick for 2.  Maven heads to the top rope but Dupree grabs his leg, which allows Rob Conway to hit a swank top rope corkscrew neck breaker to win.   

 

Ruthless C Shows WWE Velocity 10/25/2003 & WWE Heat 10/25/2003 10/26/2003

To check out this week's Raw and Smackdown podcast "Ruthless" and all the fun that goes with that, just click this link.

This week Heat has been preempted on Sunday by Spike TV so it aired Saturday Night before Velocity. 

Saturday Night Heat with Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow

Match #1 

Hurricane/Rosey vs Arch Kincaid/Bobby Rude

Hurricane gives a mask to kid ringside.  Snow asks if it gave Coach flashbacks to when his parents would put a paper bag on his head.  Hurricane and Arch Kincaid start the action with Hurricane.  The super hero starts out with an arm bar, headlock, shoulder block combo and does the patented Hurricane pose.  Arch Kincaid hits a shoulder block and does a weird pose, apparently Kincaid wants to be known as the "Sexual Intellectual".  Hurricane hits another shoulder block and once again shows Kincaid the proper pose.  

Tag to Rosey, who locks in his own arm bar.  Kincaid tries several punches to Rosey's stomach but they have no effect, so he levels Kincaid with a clothesline.  A diving splash and falling headbutt leave Kincaid in a bad way. Kincaid rakes the eyes to tag in a bleach blonde Bobby Rude.  Rosey hits them with a double clothesline and tags in Hurricane for a top rope cross body for a two count.  Kincaid low bridges Hurricane and he topples to the outside. Back in the ring, Rude lays the boots.  Tag into Kincaid for a double suplex, and some weird soft heat butts to the ribs.  Tag back to Rude for a body slam, and jumping knee, and locks in a back stretch.  Hurricane hits a desperation tornado DDT.  They both crawl to make the tag.  Rosey's hot tag has clotheslines, a back body drop, sidewalk slam, body slam, super hero leg drop.  Rude attempts to break up the cover so Rosey moves and hits Kincaid.  Rosey stacks them in the corner for a double splash.  Hurricane hits a shining wizard.  The heroes hit their finish of a spinning Somoan drop combined with a neckbreaker combo to win in 6:39. (**)

Match #2

Tommy Dreamer vs Rico with Miss Jackie

They trade headlocks, til a Rico take down that allows him to ride Tommy like a pony.  Rico offers for Tommy to ride him now, but Dreamer kicks him in the gut.  Rico jumps into Dreamer's arms Bugs Bunny in a dress and Dreamer slams him after some playful eye contact.  Rico hits a back elbow and lots of kicks and rope added pin attempt fails.  Loud Rico sucks chants.  He hits a middle rope double ax handle.  While Rico distracts the referee, Miss Jackie comes in and hits a float over DDT.  A big clothesline from the top his blocked by Dreamer.  The Innovator of Violence gets an atomic drop and neck breaker for 2.  Rico avoids the death valley driver, but his powerbomb attempt is countered into a Spicoli driver.  Jackie puts Rico's foot on the rope to avoid the pinfall.  Dreamer hits a big DDT but Jackie runs in to stop the count and Dreamer plants a kiss on her.  He turns into spinning heel kick to pick up the win in 3:42. (*)

In the back, Rosey is about have a donut.  Hurricane flies in to stop him.  "This could be why you were stuck in a phone booth", The Hurricane informs his protégée. Rosey says that it's a protein donut.  John Heidenrich enters and says they are his favorite duo.  He wants a blurry jpeg photo of the three of them with his flip phone for Little Johnny.  They agree to the photo op.  Hurricane asks if Little Johnny wants to be in a photo, but Heidenrich says that little Johnny is camera shy and leaves.  Hurricane tells Rosey, no more donuts, so Rosey walks off dejected.  Hurricane takes a bite of the donut.

Johnathan Coachman is in the ring to announce his new role as the official book reviewer of Monday Night Raw.  He will begin with Lita' s book.  He says that it is a sham because she doesn't give him any credit for her come back from neck surgery even though he inspired her every week when they were the commentary team on Heat together.  The book should be in the fiction section.  Lita comes out, and says that Coach did inspire her.  She was inspired to quit broadcasting and get back into the ring because Coach was such a pain to deal with.  Coach says he's 6'4 230 pounds and she should watch what she says.  Leave and let him finish his business.  She asks to be allowed to apologize to Coach.  Words can't express how sorry she is so she would like to show him physically.  The gently touches coach's arm and then boots him in the gut which sends him between the ropes and to the floor.  

We are show the Road Warrior Hawk tribute video.  

Match #3 

Val Venis vs Steven Richards with Victoria

Steven Richards comes out wearing a towel and mocks Val's entrance, but Val attacks before he can finish it.  Lots of punches, elbows, and kicks, until Val hits a Russian leg sweep.  Victoria grabs Val's leg which allows Richards to hit a DDT.  He heads to the top but Val hits the ropes to crotch him.  Val hits a clothesline, shoulder block, half nelson slam, and powerbomb for a 2 count.  Val goes up for the money shot but Richards gets the knees up.  Val gets the boot up on a charge and gets a fisherman suplex, but Victoria has the ref's attention.  Val makes camera motions because apparently he wants to film her for a movie made in the 1940's.  She goes to punch Val but he ducks and instead connects with Richards.  Val hits a spinebuster and then a leg lock that Richards has to tap out to because Victoria can't save him since she is very busy yelling at her fist in 4:54. (*1/4)

Velocity 

Josh Matthews as play by play and Michael Cole on color.

Michael spends most of the evening just being awful to Matthews to varying degrees of success.  But it is very weird and awkward.  Maybe we will get a similar Josh storyline on Smackdown that we got with Coach on Raw.

Match #1

Shannon Moore vs Orlando Jordon 

Orlando Jordon starts with a shoulder block and a hip toss.  Moore pokes the eyes and trips Jordon onto the ropes.  He starts laying in kicks to the head and chokes him.  Moore hits a snap suplex and a side back suplex.  OJ gets a boot up on a top rope flying nothing.  Jordon got the leg up with Moore even jumped so it looked extra stupid.  Jordon nails a flying forearm and follows it up with a back body drop and a Johnson shuffle series of punches to get a 2 count.  OJ gets caught on a corner charge with a boot by Moore who follows up with a leaping leg lariat from the middle rope.  Moore throws a tantrum after the 2 count.  He walks right into a swinging neck breaker for the win in 3:46. (*)

Match #2

Spanky & Paul London vs Rob Bagley & Mike Taylor

Spanky starts out with Bagley.  Both jobbers have platinum blonde bleached hair and served in the military.  Bagley hits a shoulder block but is quickly brought down with a drop toe hold.  He tags in Paul London who hits a sunset flip, but a kick to the guy allows for the tag to Mike Taylor.  London hits a monkey flip in the corner and Spanky nails a top rope cross body for 2.  Spanky hits a flip over drop kick on Taylor but Bagley catches him for a stun gun.  It's neck vise time.  Tag out to Bagley who locks in his own neck vise.  Riveting stuff.  Spanky rolls through to tag London.  London hits several drop kicks, avoids a double suplex.  Both jobbers are sent outside after suplexes and get hit with stereo suicide dives.  A STO shining wizard combo end it for the brand new team in 5:03 (**)

The APA are walking in the hall talking about how they wished Britney Spears would kiss Jenna Jameson.  They are aghast to see London and Spanky at their poker table.  The rookies want to celebrate their first big win.  Bradshaw is upset that they drank some of their beer and ate their popcorn.  He is so upset that he dumps other beer and popcorn on Spanky.  Bradshaw suggests that they should beat them up. Spanky begs for mercy.  Bradshaw lightens up a bit and says that in order to make in this business you have you bust your ass and Faarooq adds to drink your ass off.  Kendrick grabs a beer and pours it in his mouth.  He slumps over to the floor.  He must have had quite the head start.  The APA thinks he has some potential.  London says he doesn't drink but he'll try.  The camera pans to Faarooq who says, "Damn."

Match #3

Rey Mysterio & Ultimo Dragon & Kidman vs FBI

During the entrances Matthews says the FBI are an Italian Dream Team, the faces are an International Dream Team, Cole interrupts Matthews to say that Matthews' team is the Wet Dream Team.  What? 

Ultimo Dragon and Nunzio start out.  Nunzio gets on a kick attempt for a leg sweep.  Double back elbows as tags are made.  Kidman squares off his Johnny the Bull now.  Kidman gets an arm drag, head scissors, and clothesline for 2.  Chuck Palumbo pulls Kidman down from the apron so the heels can take advantage.  Polumbo is tagged in and starts beating Kidman in the corner, a snap mare, and spinal tap kick, neck vise.  Kidman escapes for a drop kick but gets squished with a somoan drop quickly to stop Kidman from tagging.  Kidman is able to get a hurricanrana and tags in Rey.  Nunzio is in now and gets hit with flying cross body, flapjack, and a drop kick.  Johnny the Bull comes in and sent out.   A seated senton to Palumbo.  Nunzio is kicked to the middle rope but The Bull pulls Nunzio away from the 619 and Palumbo crushes Rey.  We have a unicorn rarity moment, and two segment match on Velocity!

We're back with Rey being picked apart in the corner by the FBI.  Johnny the Bull chokes Rey.  Nunzio is in for boots and starts doing taunting jumping jacks. He locks in a neck vise.  Mysterio escapes and gets a bulldog but Palumbo runs in and pulls Rey away from making the tag and irish whips Rey hard into the corner.  Nunzio and Johnny the Bull pull Reys legs to crotch him against the ring post.   It's Nunzio and Ultimo Dragon in the ring now and Nunzio tries to back body drop him but Dragon lands on his feet and tees off on Nunzio with a series of lightning fast kicks.  He gives Palumbo a drop kick and a head scissors for Stamboli and a springboard moonsault to Nunzio.  The bigger FBI guys catch the Dragon for a double team slam.  Kidman breaks up the cover.  Johnny the Bull holds Kidman but Kidman ducks and Palumbo decks The Bull.  Springboard dropkick to Palumbo in the corner by Mysterio. Kidman baseball slides into his yambag, and immediately planchas onto Stamboli outside.  Dragon hits a series of kicks on Nunzio, goes for a running move of some sort but we'll never know as Palumbo mows him down with a huge kick.  Nunzio covers for the win in 10:22.  (**3/4)

Ruthless C Shows WWE Velocity 10/18/2003 & WWE Heat pre No Mercy Edition 10/19/2003

                                               

                         Check out this week's breakdown of Raw & Smackdown in audio form here.

                                      

         Tonight we have Tazz and Josh Mathews on commentary.  Unfortunately Tazz tells us this is his last Velocity and a new color commentator will start next week.  He will go out with a bang as we will get into later.  Stay Tuned.

                                         Match #1 

                                         A-Train vs Orlando Jordan

Train starts with knees to the gut. Jordan slides out of a powerslam and they trade strikes.  Orlando gets caught off the top with bicycle kick to the stomach.  Train lands a serious of heavy strikes.  He locks in an inverted full nelson and then drops to his knees in an impressive looking move.  Train locked in a neck vise after a snap mare.  OJ turns inside out on a slam to get a flash pin attempt.  Inziguri to the A-Train's midsection, quick jabs. Jordan's offense is short lived because he runs into a back elbow. Jordan does get his feet up on a Vader bomb.  Train misses a charge into a rollup attempt by Jordan who hits two dropkicks.  Train hits a powerful clothesline and finishes Jordan off with the Train Wreck in 4:15 (**)

Match #2

Matt Hardy with Shannon Moore vs Funaki 

During the entrances Tazz gives us a parting gift of a rant complaining about Pamela Anderson attacking Kentucky Fried Chicken over killing chickens.  Tazz goes into how you got to kill them before you can eat them and then goes after a plastic shortage because Pam Anderson, "Ya know the one with the real big hammers.", has used it all up.  Just Tazz enjoying nobody paying attention to Velocity.

Matt Fact #1 Matt still has his tonsils.

Matt Fact #2 Matt dreads winter time.

Matt starts with lots of strikes, til Funaki takes an irish whip and turns it into a head scissors.  Hardy hits a side effect and tosses Funaki outside so Shannon Moore can ram his spine into the ring.  Matt does a powerslam and then locks in an abdominal stretch. Funaki drives Hardy into the corner for some shoulders to the midsection, but Moore trips him. Hardy misses a corner splash and Funaki hits on a bulldog as Hardy stumbles out.  Funaki reverses a powerslam attempt into a reverse DDT.  Funaki hits the Rising Sun which is a reverse tornado DDT out of the corner.  Funaki can't make the cover quickly so Hardy is able to kick out at 2.  Moore hops up on the apron.  Hardy reverses a whip and goes for the Twist of Fate, but Funaki shoves him away towards Shannon.  Matt puts on the brakes and Funaki charges.  Hardy evades him, so Funaki collides with Moore.  Funaki turns right into the Twist of Fate and Matt gets the three count in 5:11 (**)  This is the last television match for the V-1 character.  

Match #3

Ultimo Dragon vs Joey Matthews 

They trade positioning attempts until Mathews gets a rollup for 2.  He super celebraters with struts.  He goes on the attack with knees and chops.  Dragon catches Matthews with a leg sweep, series of kicks, and drop kick.  Matthews bails and Dragon pursues, which allows Matthew to pull Dragon's feet out from under him and crack his chin on the apron.  Mathews throws him back into the ring and connects with a top rope clothesline.  He locks in a neck vise.  Dragon rolls through and gets a kick to the face, but Matthew is quick to put him down with a neck breaker and goes back to the vise.  Ultimo gets out with a corner springboard jaw breaker, back body drop, spin heel kick combination for 2 count.  A big kick to the chest after a roll through by Dragon.  He misses a springboard dive which lets Matthews drop him for a 2 count and then a body slam.  Matthews gets caught on a top rope dive with a drop kick.  Asai DDT seals the victory for Dragon in 5:13. (2.25)

Match #4

APA vs FBI (Nunzio and Chuck Palumbo)

The FBI tries to sneak attack with chairs in the aisle but get intercepted.  Faarooq scrambles Palumbo's brains with a chair. Nunzio scoots away towards the ring begging for mercy.  Just like tomorrow's pay per view event, there will be No Mercy.  Bradshaw throws him into the steps.  He tosses Nunzio into the ring and the match is on as the bell rings.  Last Call fallaway slam to Nunzio.  Quickly tags in Faarooq to lands some hard forearms.  Nunzio tries to escape the ring but gets dragged back in.  Faarooq hits a powerslam and a back breaker.  Bradshaw is in to join in on a double shoulder block and power bomb.  Faarooq is back in for a spine buster.  Faarooq holds up Nunzio's corpse for a Clothesline from Hell.  Bradshaw hits him with a second one.  Faarooq pins Nunzio with a single hand in 4:03.  (1/2*)

Bradshaw grabs the microphone, "Nunzio, don't take that personal. You're just the first but you won't be the last.  Bashams, the APA was just fine sitting in our office drinking beer and playing cards, when you tried to make your name off of us.  I tell you what you just got a bunch of people's asses whipped.  We will not discriminate.  I don't care if you're black, brown, white, purple, or green.  Man, woman, or child.  Heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. We will knock your ass out."

That's it for Velocity stay tuned for Confidential, we shall miss thee, Tazz.  

This episode is dedicated in loving memory of Stu Hart.  

Our pre No Mercy Heat is hosted by Josh Matthews and a young lady only known as Rue. Fun fact those two get married.  It lasts for a whole two years of wedded bliss. 

Rue only one name like Cher

The show is mostly pay per view hype videos but we do get a Big Show interview with Michael Cole where he talks about how fecal matter has been falling out of his ears for 10 days and he is going to destroy Eddie Guerrero today. 

Tazz interview the Basham brothers who lament the loss of Shaniqua the source of their sexual desires and challenge the APA tonight at the pay per view.  Based on Bradshaw's promo at the end of Velocity.  I assume they will accept.  

 

Match #1

Shannon Moore vs Billy Kidman

Cole and Tazz are commentary for this as we won't get to see if the enigma know as Rue can call a match.  They trade go behinds, Kidman gets a head scissors and sends Moore outside.  Moore ducks a baseball slide by Kidman and throws him into the barricade in a fun spot.  Moore hits a back suplex and locks in a neck vice.  He converts over to a leg lariat to the back of the head, body slam and locks in a back stretch.  Kidman gets a desperation drop kick to put both men down.  Kidman is up with a flying forearm, back body drop, and clothesline that drops Moore in the corner.  Kidman hits a baseball slide directly into Moore's yambag as Tazz says, which for some reason isn't a DQ.  Kidman goes for a suplex by Moore lands on his feet and hits spinning neck breaker.  Kidman attempts a turnbuckle assisted bulldog but Moore counters with a drop toe hold into the 2nd turnbuckle.  Moore nails a corkscrew moonsault for a false finish.  Moore throws a tantrum, this allows Kidman enough time to recover, hit an enziguri, drag Moore to the corner, and climb to the top to attempt a 450. Moore intercepts on the top Kidman wins the battle and comes down with a BK bomb to pick up the win in 5:14. (***)

We find out that heat will be moved to Saturday night at 7 next week.  We aren't told what will air in it's place. We get a promo package for the Lesnar vs Undertaker chain match main event and we go off the air transitioning to No Mercy.