RuthlessCee Show Aggressive (WWE Velocity 7/19/03 Heat 7/20/03)

 

We are welcomed into the 7/29/03 Velocity by our hosts Josh Matthews and Ernest "The Cat" Miller.  

Match #1

The FBI (Chuck Palumbo and Johnny "The Bull" Stamboli with Nunzio vs Spanky and Funaki

Spanky and Funaki hit several quick strikes on Chuck with fast tagging in and out.  Double team drop kicks.  Chuck finally gets the edge via a vicious clothesline.  Palumbo and Stamboli tag in and out, nailing Spanky with fists and boots.  Nunzio holds Spanky's arm and pulls him halfway out of the ring so Chuck can kick his head off in a nasty looking spot.  The FBI continues to tag in and out and beat on Spanky with power moves.  Spanky hits both with a desperation drop kick.  Funaki gets the hot tag.  Drops both Itatlian big men wiht drop kicks.  Spanky is right back in the fight and perfectly fine seconds after taking minutes of beating from two larger men.  Spanky gets swatted away on a drop kick and tossed out of the ring.  A possible double team move is set up by the FBI (see above) but Spanky is quick to break it up from the outside.  Still perched on the ropes, Stamboli hits a bulldog on Spanky.  Funaki has recovered and nails his own top rope tornado DDT to get the pin on Johnny the Bull, in a surprising outcome in 4:56.  Surprising that two guys who are Velocity mainstays would get the win against the FBI who have been featured on Smackdown lately.  (** 3/4) 

Match #2

Doug and Danny Bashams with Shaniqua vs Johnny Jeter and Matt Cappotelli

The Bashams entertain the crowd with some boot licking and whipping of her team.  The crowd is not impressed.  Matt Cappotelli is one of the winner's of Tough Enough 3.  Tough Enough was constantly mentioned during the the first two seasons, but this is the first I am even hearing about it and the show is already over.  Very odd and bad for some old fashioned brand synergy.  Doug and Matt tie up.  Doug works over the rookie's arms.  A missed clothesline gives Cappotelli a chance to hit a drop kick.  Matt follows him out and Shaniqua gets in his way allowing, the Bashams to take control again.  Doug and Danny tag in and out taking turns roughing up Matt.  Double clothesline into a snapmare with a drop kick to the back of the head.  The Bashams tag and we get another snapmare but this time it is followed up by an elbow drop.  

The Bashams hit a move commentary calls the "Meat Curtain"  which is a double team slingshot into a top bulldog.  It's a nice tag team move but that name is nightmare juice.  Assumed that was going to be the finish but the pin is broken up by Jeter.  We get a headlock, tag and then another head lock.  I can't tell if the story of the match are the Bashams are so in sync that they are doing the same moves after tags or Cappotelli only knows how to a few moves.  Cappotelli dropped down to turn the headlock into a jawbreaker.  

Hot tag to Johnny Jeter, as he hits an enzuigury and a slingblade.  Cappotelli comes in with a cross body out of nowhere.  Shaniqua gets on the apron and distracts the ref which allows the Bashams to hit the Ball and Gag which is a clothesline Russian leg sweep combo for the win in 8:83.  It was a really long squash match. (*).

We return from commercial and Matt Cappotelli is in the back talking to fellow Tough Enough 3 winner John Hennigan (the future Johnny insert last name here).  The APA come by and invite the rookies to join in on their APA Barroom Brawl Invitation at Vengeance sponsored by Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Angel of Darkness.  The rookies accept although it doesn't seem like it was a choice.  

Match #3

A-Train vs Orlando Jordan

A fan has a A-Train Shaving Station with an arrow pointing down.  Does that mean this fan wants A-Train to sit on his lap while he shaves A-Train? The announcers act like this is the fan insulting the Train but I would in fact argue that this is a true sign of love.  This person is A-Train's biggest fan.  Train tosses the steps and Josh jumps into the crowd.  This has been going for a few weeks and I wonder if we will see Josh in the ring at some point.  Velocity is brough to us by the new movie S.W.A.T.  starring Colin Farrell, Burger King, and Truth anti smoking campaign so you know this is 2003.  

Train starts with some power control moves.  Jordan hits a drop kick, but A-Train comes back with a single arm DDT to regain control.  Train doles out some corner knees and kicks until Jordan lands an enzuigury, (enzuigury, the official plucky underdog comeback move of this July 19th, episode of Velocity).  Jordan hits a few more nice looking drop kicks and then a flying forearm for a 2 count.  Train powers out of the corner and nails a huge bicycle kick for 2. He picks up Jordan for the Trainwreck for the win in 4:08. (*1/2)

Match #4 

Dawn Marie vs Nidia

Before the match Dawn Marie gets the microphone and taunts Nidia for Jaime Noble offering money to spend a night with Torrie Wilson.  The bell rings and Nidia charges for a corner attack but comes up empty.  Dawn hits a reverse atomic drop follows that up with chops in the corner.  Dawn tries a corner springboard but Nidia hits the ropes and Dawn falls into the tree of woe.  Nidia hits a dropkick to the upside down Dawn Marie but it is only enough for a 2 count.  Nidia chokes her on the ropes.  Dawn reverses an Irish whip and hits a cross body from the top, back elbow, and a body slam.  A missed Vader Bomb gives control back to Nidia and then a sequence of sloppy pin combos, Nidia grabs the rope but doesn't actually apply any more pressure to the pin using the "extra leverage" for the win in 3:54.  (1/2 *)

We are welcomed to Sunday Night Heat by our announcers Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow. 

Match#1

La Resistance vs Mark Jindrak and Garrison Cade 

Sylvan Grenier attacks Mark Jindrak.  Jindrak quickly gets the advantage back with a couple of drop kicks and locks in an arm bar.  Sylvan elbows his way free and tags to Rene Dupree who takes a few shoulder blocks.  Punches are exchanged, Sylvan catches Cade with a knee to the back coming off the ropes and the heels take control.  Cade takes a beating outside and is tossed into the barricade. Jindrak makes it in to save Cade from the pinfall.  Sylvan chokes Cade with the ropes and tags in Dupree for a headlock.  Cade drops down for a jawbreaker for the hot tag.  We had the exact sequence in the Bashams match last night.  Jindrak lands a couple of back body drops and a springboard clothesline.  Cade lifts Sylvan and Jindrak hits a beautiful dropkick for the upset win at 3:45.  The height was impressive.  (** 1/4 a whole star added for the finishing move).  It was a non title match but this should lead to a title shot one would assume.

Al Snow interviews Stevie after his loss in the 6 man match this past Monday.  He wants to know why Stevie is so happy despite losing to Kevin Nash.  Stevie says that he is happy because millions of people watch RAW and the exposure will mean that millions of people will watch Stevie Night Heat.  This will corollate to higher ratings and more money.  That will mean raises for some of the Stevie Night Heat staff.  Al Snow wants that money but doesn't think Coach should get a raise.  Stevie announces that next week he will take on Goldust for the millions of fans.  Al reminds Stevie that he suspended Goldust indefinity. Stevie says ok then, he's lifting the suspension.  He wants everyone to forget the name Goldust and remember Stevie Richards.

Match #2

Tommy Dreamer vs Nick Dinsmore

Tommy Dreamer starts off with a snapmare into a headlock.  Dinsmore forces the Innovator of Violence into the corner and lands some punches and kicks.  Dinsmore misses a corner leap and eats some punches and bails out.  Dreamer lifts him back to apron by his hair and suplexes him back into the ring.  Dreamer misses a charge into the corner and posts his shoulder.  Dinsmore starts to work on his arm and lays him out with a body slam.  Dreamer gets the boot up to block the top the rope flying nothing.  Dreamer hits a neckbreaker, punches, back body drop combo.  A sit down spine buster gets two and then a Death Valley Driver gives the win to Tommy Dreamer for the win in 3:21. (*)

Match #3

The Hurricane vs Rob Conway

Snow and Coach inform us that we have the same sponsors as Velocity this week.  Hurricane offers a handshake but Conway hits him with a cheap shot kick to the stomach.  He sends Hurricane into the ropes but the super hero catches himself and mocks Conway.  Hurricane low bridges Conway on a charge to take advantage on the outside.  Conway nails Hurricane on the way back in to get into control.  He chokes away in the corner.  A knee and a swinging neck breaker for 2.  Conway digs his knee in the small of the back of Hurricane to try to get the submission.  Hurricane escapes and nails a flying clothesline to even out the odds. Hurricane with a reverse knee drop, a headlock drop (hey I don't know alot of moves names, but hey what a maneuver), and a running neck breaker.  Conway gets his foot on the rope to stop the pinfall.  Hurricane plants him with a rotating DDT and then the Shining Wizard for the win in 3:39. (**)

Miss Jackie in catering and drops a coffee stirrer.  Val Venis comes in a leers at her buttocks.  He would like to get Jackie to work for his video company and would like to put a little extra milk in her coffee.  <shudder> Rico appears and informs Val that he would like to star in Val's videos.  Val says he doesn't make those kind of videos.  Rico thinks that Val thinks he is more of a man that him.  Val looks into his tights and confirms that yes he thinks he is more of a man than Rico.  Rico challenges him to a match tonight. 

Match #4

Val Venis vs Rico with Miss Jackie

Val's prematch spiel is interrupted by Rico's music after Hello Ladies.  Jackie removes the bright neon green pants of Rico to reveal a much more reasonable purple leopard print pants.  Val is uncomfortable from Rico's flamboyance.  Rico gets an audible "Rico sucks" chant.  Rico gooses Val and skips away.  He then jumps into Val's arms and plants the Bugs Bunny kiss on Val's cheek.  We get our first move of the  match and is in an armbar.  Rico used all of his mind games to finally get an arm bar, which is immediately countered into his armbar.  Rico somersaults out of it and continues to somersault n circles around Val.  Rico preens for the crowd and then takes a fist right to mush.  Val nails a back elbow and elbow drop for 2.  Val lands an uranage for another two count.  Rico locks in a sleeper and Vals immediately reverses it into his own.  Rico gets out with a back suplex.  Val Venis kicks out at 2.  Val hits a spinning sit down powerbomb for his own 2 count.  Rico grabs the ref which lets Jackie trip up Val. When Val goes after Jackie, Rico sneaks in from behind and rolls him up for the win after 3:31. (*1/2)

Tune in tomorrow night on RAW for Jericho vs Shawn Michaels, Kane vs RVD, and CEO Linda McMahon will announce the plans for RAW leadership, is Austin out of power?  

Match #4

See you next week!

RuthlessCee Show Aggressive (WWE Velocity 7/12/03 Heat 7/13/03)

 

Velocity July 12, 2003

Announcers: Josh Mathews and Ernest "The Cat" Miller

Match #1

Sean O'Haire vs Bobby Rude

This Bobby Rude character sure looks VERY similar to Bobby Roode who would come to WWE years later.  Josh mentions that Rude is a Canadian trained by Val Venis, just like Roode.  Uncanny.  We start out with some slow chain wrestling.  O'Haire sends Rude to the outside and lands some hard kicks to the back.  Rude gets brought back in and chucked across the ring.  After some taunting, O'Haire lands more really hard kicks to the kidneys.  Rude tries to get the crowd behind him to get out of a headlock but they politely decline.  Whipped hard into the corner and O'Haire hits the widowmaker for the win at 5:06.  O'Haire looked like a killer in this match.  He towered over Rude which shows how the industry has changed over the years as Roode did not look undersized during his run in WWE much later. (*1/2) 

Kanyon vs Orlando Jordan

We begin with headlocks, arm drags, hip tosses being exchanged.  A failed top rope move attempt by Jordan leads to a top rope Russian leg sweep from the top by Kanyon.  Kayon hits a Lethal Leg Drop in the other corner and locks in a headlock.  Jordan tries to fire out but eats a huge neckbreaker.  Orlando turn the tide with a powerbomb out of the corner and we get a standing 10 count.  Jordan nails a flying foreman and three pretty dropkicks.  Jordan hits Rocky Johnson shuffle punches in an ode to his mentor.  Jordan recerses a Flatliner attempt into a reverse neck breaker for the win in 7:15.  This match had some athletic and innovative moves.  Told a good story of the veteran dominating the rookie until the rookie unleashed his athletism.  Good stuff.   (** 3/4)

Match #3

A-Train vs Funaki

A-Train chases Josh around the ring.  Ernest gives Josh crap for being a wimp when he returns.  Funaki dodges some moves and then bows to A-Train.  Train chases Funaki around the ring in anger. As A-Train tries to follow him in Funaki lands a kick and then a dive to the outside.  Funaki tries some more fast attacks once back in the ring and eats a big boot followed up by a body slam.  Funaki punches out of a powerbomb, hits a bulldog, and then a dropkick to the face of a downed A-Train.  Train catches Funaki on a dive from the second rope and hits the trainwreck for the win in 2:25 (*).  After the bout Train heads over to intimidate Mathews again.  

Match #4 Nunzio vs Spanky

The rest of the FBI will be stuck in the back with a case of the mud butt, from their tainted by Spanky earlier in the night. Spanky starts out with a standing switch.  Nunzio hits a shoulder block but gets tripped by Spanky.  Spanky runs up the ropes to maintain headlock control in a nice spot.  Test of strength which is broken up by a Nunzio slap.  Spanky hits a fast paced hurricanrana,  and heads to the top but Nunzio yanks him to the mat.  Nunzio tries to ground Spanky with a reverse chin lock. Kendrick fights out and eats the turnbuckle via drop toe hold.  Nunzio hits a top rope dropkick and gets a near fall.  Kendrick skins the cat and hits a flying forearm.  He runs the corner into flip onto Nunzio.  Spanky tries for the sliced bread #2 but Nunzio reverses it to the Arrivederci which is a 2nd rope spring board DDT for the win in 6:00  Quickly paced and Spanky bumped like crazy.  (**1/2)

Sunday Night Heat 

July 13th, 2003

Announcers: Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow

Triple H pulls up in a limo talking to the Nature Boy on his flip phone.  He wants the Nature Boy to have the ladies hot and the champagne cold because it's not going to take long.

Match #1 

Scott Steiner with Stacy Keibler vs Ruffy Silverstein

During Steiner's entrance with Stacy, a fan's sign is shown "Got Legs?"  Hey Zach Gowen is on Smackdown and that isn't very nice anyway.  I thought Canadians were supposed to be nice.  Silverstein is wearing khaki shorts with a belt so I assume he is business casual John Cena.

Scott starts off with a shoulder block and a few running kicks to the face.  Ruffy Silverstein rakes the eyes starts landing blows on Steiner in the corner.  Ruffy tries a leapfrog but is caught by Steiner for a powerslam.  Now it's Steiner's turn to land some strikes in the corner.  Ruffy tries to the propel off the turnbuckles and get behind your charging opponent thing but goes too hard and flip head first over the turnbuckles to the floor in a scary moment. Steiner heads out and chucks him into the stairs before bringing him into the ring and tying him into the tree of woe. Steiner lets him down and hits a vicious clothesline.  Elbow drop and some pushups.  Steiner plants him with a belly to belly.  Steiner hits some kind of a facebuster, I really have no idea, I'm not a move guy for the win in 3:17. (1/2 *)

Steven Richards heads over to join the commentary team.  

Match #2

La Resistance vs Tyson Dux and Bobby Rude

On the way to the ring Rene Dupree lets the French Canadians know that they don't think the French Canadians are French.  They suck like Americans.  Stevie is acting like he is general manager of Stevie Night Heat and he signs the two young jobbers.  La Res attacks before the bell.  Stevie announces that he has suspended Goldust from Stevie Night Heat, with pay because he has a family to feed.  La Resistance tags in and out with beating on Tyson Dux with punches and kicks.  They hit a double hip toss for two.  Dux hits a kick and makes it to Rude for the hot tag.  Rude clears house a bit and causes Rene to accidently clothesline Sylvan.  Dupree makes the save on the pin.  They dispose of Dux and then hit the Bonsoir Double Spinebuster on Rude for the win in 3:20 (1/2*) 

Stevie enters the ring to celebrate and gives double cheek kisses to both members of La Resistance who are confused.  

Teri Runnels interviews Maven backstage about the biggest match of his career.  Maven says how along every step of the way that people told him he was crazy.  He's going to go out their prove himself tonight. Coach and Snow promote Gail Kim vs Molly Holly for the title tomorrow night.  Triple H enters Maven's lockerroom and says that he thinks the kid has a heck of a future. He wants Maven to enjoy his big night and savor it because they isn't any shame in getting beaten by the Game.  

Match #3 Triple H vs Maven

Since I'm watching this match not on Peacock when get the Tough Enough theme for Maven, which is better than the bootleg version.  Triple H dominates with some limb control moves.  A sequence of shoulder block, lay down, hip toss, and couple of drop kicks gives Maven his first advantage in the bout.  Triple H rolls to the outside to regroup.  Triple reenters and suckers Maven in to take the advantage and chucks Maven outside.  Maven reverses a head slam to stairs and delivers one of his own. We head to commercial.  A rarity here in C show land.  A two segment match!  

Back after the commercial, Maven hits a neck breaker for a two count.  Triple H hits a spinebuster to reset the match.  They exchange fists until HHH can hit his patented lifting knee strike for a two count. Triple H chokes him on the middle rope and starts slapping Maven around disrespectfully. Maven gets a flash rollup attempt off a suplex setup for 2. Al Snow says that Maven is definitely the dark horse in this match and he isn't just talking about skin color.......

Maven catches Triple H with a forearm and then a backdrop.  He mounts HHH in the corner and starts landing fists to the head, Triple H walks him out and Maven blocks the atomic drop and hits a clothesline to maintain the advantage.  HHH yanks the tights to send Maven to the outside.  The Game has had enough and heads to get his title belt.  He misses the belt shot on Maven.  HHH heads back into the ring shoves referee Charles Robinson out of the way.  While the ref isn't looking, Maven hits HHH with the belt for a false finish 2 count.  Triple H's sleeper is quickly reversed into Maven's own sleeper.  Triple H fights for the ropes but quickly fades to the ground.  Triple H gets his foot on the rope as his arm falls a third time to break the hold.  

Maven heads to the top and HHH pushes Robinson into the ropes to cause Maven to crotch himself.  He goes to attack but Maven fends him off.  He lands a top rope bulldog to the champ.  He goes back up this time for a cross body that Triple rolls through for  a pin attempt.  Triple H sets up the pedigree but Maven breaks free and sends Triple H off the ropes.  Maven lowers his head for back body drop and in a cool moment, Snow says, "No, too early kid!"  Triple H catches him and plants him with a pedigree for the win in 10:09.  This match told a great story, had some fun nearfalls that you could bite on because it was non title, and made Maven look good and didn't make Triple H look bad.  (*** 1/2)

We head off the air and get ready for another week of Ruthlessly Aggressive action.  

 

RuthlessCee Show Aggressive Companion (Velocity July 5th, 2003 and Heat July 6th, 2003)

                                                             July 5th, 2023 Velocity

                                                                                    

                                   Commentators: Jose Matthews and Ernest "The Cat" Miller

Match #1

Jaime Noble with Nidia vs Spanky

Noble attacks from behind before the bell.  Spanky gets huge air on a plancha to the outside. Noble counters a top rope crossbody to an armbar.  The announcers are spending this time debating the legitimacy of Nidia's fur coat which was admitted to be fake on Smackdown, which Jose points out.  I don't know if Cat's character doesn't watch Smackdown or if Cat for real doesn't watch Smackdown. 

Noble holds to a top rope armbar despite a powerbomb. Spanky twists his body to get into a position to land kicks on Noble to break the hold.  Nidia trips Spanky to let Noble hit a single armed DDT for a near fall.  Spanky comes back with some quick drop kicks and a running knee. Unlike Danielson and Cade who trained with Spanky this does not lead to a victory.  Hurricanrana by Spanky is reversed into paydirt and then a dragon sleeper for the tap out for Noble in 5:48 *** 1/4

Noble and Nidia make out in the ring to celebrate.

Match #2

Sean O'Haire vs Funaki

The post Roddy Piper world for O'Haire begins now.  Matthews tells us that O'Haire's music is "C'mon" by Waterproof Blonde which is a very 2003 song title and band name.  Funaki starts off with quick kicks and arm drags.  O'Haire flattens him with a clothesline and then chucks him across the ring.  In an odd spot, O'Haire goes for a cover after a missed drop kick.  He locks in a violent looking headlock.  Funaki gets some hope with a bulldog.  He gets caught coming off the top rope but reverses that into a swinging DDT.  O'Haire takes Funaki down with a punch and then hits the Widow maker for the win in  4:08 * 1/2

Match #3 

Kanyon vs Mike Bell

Mike Bell is a former college nose tackle and the guy who Saturn beat the crap out of a few years ago.  Bell is super sloppy and does not sell very well.  Often just laying there.  It's boring and slow until Bell hits a fallaway slam into a bridge pin attempt that he calls the Mid Hudson Bridge.  Knayon escapes and hits the Flatliner for the win in 4:35 *.

Match #4

Matt Hardy vs Shannon Moore 

Matt has requested this match because he is tired of Shannon failing him.  He is giving him one last chance to show that he has Mattitude.  

Matt Fact #1: Matt is giving Shannon one last chance.

Matt Fact #2: Matt likes pepper more than salt.  

Shannon doesn't want to fight.  Matt slaps him to fire him up.  Shannon fights back but gets over powered. Matt hits a second rope leg drop for a standing taunt pin.  Moore fires back with a top rope spinning neck breaker.  Shannon hits a top rope Halo to the outside is a nice spot.  Matt wins with a surprise small package in 5:29 ** 3/4.

Shannon is upset and Matt offers him a handshake.  Shannon hesitates at first but accepts as they share a V-1 hand sign to prove that he has shown his Mattitude.  Matt celebrates as we go of the air. 

Sunday Night Heat 

7/6/2003

Commentators: Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow

We open in the back with Steven Richards talking to Victoria about how great Stevie Night Heat has been going since he is 2-0, the last two weeks. Richards called over a guy in a headset to find out when his match is but is told that he isn't booked.  Time to hit the trampoline, Dennis Stamp style.  Steven is upset and Goldust appears to mock him.  His turrets turns into a Richards' whacks off joke.  Goldust leaves a very upset Richards and heads off for his match.  

Commentators: Johnathan Coachman and Al Snow

Match #1 Goldust vs Ken Phoenix

Phoenix is the future Kenny Dykstra.  Stevie comes out to complain to the announce team that he isn't booked on his show.  Goldust is hitting is traditional moveset on Kenny but all the focus is on Stevie.  Goldust wins with a twisting powerslam. (1:27 *) Stevie comes in and hits a Stevie Kick and shattered dreams on Goldust.  Stevie screams about Heat being his show.

Match #2 Garrison Cade vs Mike Doane

Cade overpowers with arm work. Doane hits a dropkick and boots in the corner.  Shoulder block and a missed elbow drop allows Cade to take back over.  Big punches by Cade and then Cade wins with an awkward move that Snow calls a reverse bulldog in 3:44 (*)

Match #3 Val Venis vs Mike Bell

Val gives us some golf based sex puns that don't really land.  Bell is better in this outing than his Velocity showing but his movements are still choppy.  Snow and Coach have an interaction about Coach getting beaten up by a large woman at the bar.  Snow says that she is the kind of big that she leaves the house in heels and comes back in flip flops.  Val wins with the money shot in (2:30 *1/2)

Match #4 

Dudley Boys vs Rodney Mack/Rosey with Teddy Long and Chris Nowinski

Teddy says that this is Rosey's chance to earn his Player's Card.  Teddy yells Bam! and puts a credit card in Rosey's face.  Rosey wants it real bad so he must have poor credit.  

The match starts after coming back from commercial with D-Von and Mack in the ring.  They trade some fast paced basic moves.  They tag in their partners and Rosey and Bubba hit a double cross body in an impressive spot for gentleman of that size. They both make the tag and Nowinski trips D-von.  Rosey. D-Von gets double teamed and quick tagged until he makes the hot tag to Bubba.  Bubba cleans house and the hit a double suplex on Rosey.  Mack hits Rosey on the break up attempt.  "Wazzup" spot to Mack while Nowinski stupidly distracts the ref.  Rosey hits Somoan drops to the Dudley's like any good Bloodline member should.  Nowinski accidently gets in Rosey's way to set up the 3D for the Dudley victory.  (**3/4).  In a match that was way better than I expected.  Long is mad at Rosey when it was clearly all Harvard Chris's fault.  

We go off the air with a reminder to watch RAW tomorrow night.