HTPB 24.11

 

Here we go!

Big Nasty Express 112 defeat The Collegians 93

A college graduate with a bindle is tossed from a moving train called BNE

BNE got almost 80 points from the three headed law firm of Robinson, McBride, and McMillan, which was almost enough to beat the The Collegians combined effort.   The Collegians have lost 6 of 7 and will be duking it out for the toilet.  I wonder how many times he can think of a reason to send a picture of that to the chat.  Big Nasty Express finds itself with a 6-5 record and two games against other playoff level record teams.  They can pave their own way to the playoffs, and they will need to because the point total isn't winning tiebreakers.

Stabmybalzrepeatedly 93 defeat Dollars 64

A man in a beard and hoodie steals an 18 pack for Miller Lite from a male nurse in dollar sign scrubs.

SMBR may have picked up a shaky win to get even with the fantasy gods for so many tough losses earlier in the year, but at what cost? He might have to sell a few more games and cards to make up on the lost playoff revenue. He may have lost Josh Jacobs and Jaylen Warren.  SMBR has more red letters on his squad than a can of Spaghetti O's A to Z.  Dollars has resigned to Joe Burrow to play him for one week before he season ends after week 14 and spend the summer thinking about what might have been.  Although Dollars has averaged 18 points from the QB position since the Burrow injury so maybe it wouldn't have been much better. 

Bricklayers 107 defeat Ogre's Death Squad 101

Shrek chokes on a brick while a man with large hair prevents EMT's from saving him.

TreVeyon Henderson finally paid of Bricklayers and looks to be a good player for the squad going forward, luckily we are dynasty league.  Although it may be enough to keep the Layers out of the toilet for the second consecutive season. Aaron Rodgers broke his wrist and Sam Darnold may be turning back into a pumpkin, so ODS' year long saga at QB may be hitting rock bottom at the wrong time.  With a final schedule that includes 3 current playoff teams, it could be an epic Big Eing away of this season.  

Rush'n Missiles 123 defeat Italian Stallions 108

A football coach shouts "Get Back" while stomping on a birthday present meant for a sad horse.

Dak and CD Lamb attempted an epic Monday Night comeback, but came up short.  It was hard to beat Josh Allen with 46 points and 6 touchdowns.  He needed all of those points as nobody else had a notable day and required a tight end to get a 35 yard rushing touchdown.  The Missiles seemed poised for the playoffs and the Loins are trying to avoid the toilet for however many time, it's a lot.  

Los Zapatistas 106 defeat Hardcore Cabinet 101

A wolf in a sombrero throws a pretender of the throne of footballs

Los Zapatistas has the number one seed in his grasp and would likely have to go 1-2 down the stretch to have in slip through his manos.  The disgusting and stupid Steelers defense netted 31 points including two touchdowns to overcome Sunshine Herbert having a cloudy day.  It was enough to beat Hardcore Cabinet's meh performance from the squad as Jeanty let the team down coming 9 points short of his projection.  It was Hardcore Cabinet's one shot at stealing the bye and he blew it like poseur. 

BayBay's 89.73 defeat Blue Gatorade 89.54

A mountie defeats a bald college kid in a wheelchair race.

In a matchup that somebody had to win and came less 0.2 of actually having no one win, Bay-Bay's tied his franchise record of 6 wins.  Will BB be able to go 2-1 and get his first winning record? He must get that against HC, EBD, and BL.  You know your quarterback is shitty when he sets the NFL record for completions in a game and only nets you 22 points.  How many years in a row will Blue Gatorade continue to suck?

Eh Big Dude 114 defeats Tinker Stinker 110

A tree gives unwanted advice to a dwarf regarding Lamar Jackson

EBD was able to use a well rounded attack led by George Pickens' 23 to get the win over The Stinkers.  Christian McCaffery continues to the only 49 who hasn't gotten injured and continues to rake in the points.  It seemed like CMC's hamstring was falling off the bone like one of TS's smoked meats, but no he's been completely healthy.  Hasn't missed any time.  Both teams round out the season, with a hard game, a solid opponent, and cupcake.

This week was won by Tinker Stinkers with 6-1.  Presumably only missing his own game.  The rear was loaded with 2's from BL, ODS, and BNE.  Coincidentally, the people who made me send a reminder to.  Karma? EBD is the overall leader while $$ has leapt over BG to put Max in last place everywhere. 

The Wolves who have good squads but may be shaky on the definition of the word "Lone"

1. LZ 103-40

2. TS 101-42

3. RM 91-52

Could make waves

4. ODS 79-64

5. EBD 78-65

6. SMBR 77-66

Frisky

7. IS 69-74

8. HC 67-76

9. TC 67-76

Not very good

10. BNE 63-80

11. BL 60-83

12. BB 54-89

13. $$ 53-90

Awful

14. BG 39-104

#1 Seed

LZ 77% HC 13% RM 5% ODS 2% TS 1%

Playoffs 99% and up LZ, RM, HC

90% and up ODS, TS 

66% and up SMBR, EBD

Holding out for a hero

BB 33%, BNE 28%

Also still participating less that 1%

BL, $$, TC, IS, BG

Game of the Week

#2 Hardcore Cabinet vs #8 BayBay's

#4 ODS vs #7 EBD

#9 BNE vs #5 TS

#10 BL vs #1 LZ

#11 $$ vs RM #3

Toilet Bowl Game of the Week

#13 The Collegians vs #14 Blue Gatorade

Great luck to all this week.